Category Archives: Wipe the Drool

I Did It.

I hit my goal weight!

I FOUND THE WORLD’S BEST BACON.

This isn't it.

This isn’t it.

During recent travels, I stumbled across a fun little bar and restaurant in Seattle called The 5 Point Café. (No, they’re not paying me to mention this. Though if they were, I’d ask for compensation exclusively in pig.) They opened in 1929 and own the bragging rights of “the longest run family eatery in Seattle and oldest bar still in existence in Belltown.”

Seattle_-_Five_Point_Cafe_01

I did not know this when I entered.

All I went equipped with was the recommendation of my hotel concierge:

ME: Any good spots nearby for breakfast?

CONCIERGE: Well 5 Point has sort of your typical diner breakfast, and they’re just up the block. Everyone has tattoos.

ME (to self): Gee, I’m sure you mentioned that last bit knowing I’ll fit right in.

Why didn’t anyone warn me they don’t wear colors in the Pacific Northwest?

Seriously. Why didn’t anyone warn me they don’t wear colors in the Pacific Northwest? (Photo taken in front of de wonderbaar Auld Holland Inn in Oak Harbor, WA.)

The idea of an omelet and mimosa was too much temptation to resist for this Jersey native, so I zipped up my bright red raincoat and trekked around the corner to find an unassuming café with a large U-shaped bar and seating on either side.

5-pt-cafe-interior

I was told I could sit anywhere, and because it was a quiet Wednesday morning, decided to hog (pun SO intended) a booth. When the coffee came, I closed my eyes and smiled. Ah, Seattle. Thank you. Thank you for getting it. I may wear neon, but I like my coffee black, and jet fuel strong.

I took an uncharacteristically long time to order, because everything on the menu sounded so good. I was craving avocado, so finally went with the California eggs benedict. At the last minute, I said, “Can I get a side of bacon, too, please?” It was $4 for 4 strips. I couldn’t decide if this was a bargain or a rip-off, so reserved judgment.

When my plate came, I was overwhelmed. In the best way. There were two poached eggs atop tomatoes and avocado, resting on dense english muffins. All of this was smothered in hollandaise sauce, alongside PERFECT hash browns: shredded, with a completely crunchy, crispy top. 

5-Pt-Cafe-CA-eggs-benedict

Good morning to ME.

But then.

Oh.

And then.

The afterthought side dish:

5-Pt-bacon-heaven

“Our famous bacon,” the waiter said, as he rested the magical plate to my left. Four strips of the thickest bacon I’d ever seen sat before me. Still, I was skeptical.  Was it too thick? Would it still be crispy?

I took a bite and… cue Meg Ryan-When-Harry-Met-Sally moment. It melted in my mouth. I took another bite. My life was forever changed. It was tender and fluffy, yet fatty and crispy. I saw the face of Leonardo DiCaprio wrapped in the voice of Justin Timberlake ensconced in the body of Channing Tatum.

Their website makes it sound like they might marinate it. Maybe it was deep fried. I don’t know. I don’t care. I don’t even know what I did on the rest of that trip. All I know is I’m going back.

For bacon.

5-pt-bacon-2

What’s the most decadent thing you’ve ever eaten?

P.S. – I’m actually headed to BaconFest 2014 in Chicago next month and will let you know if I find anything that can top this. Anyone else going?!

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About these ads

Set Your DVRs. TONIGHT.

Oh. Oh-hoh-oh-oh-oh.

CHIPMUNKS.

Sometimes, friends send you things on Facebook that they think SCREAMS you, and you think, “Meh. Okay.” Or “Yeah, that’s cute.”

But sometimes, friends send you things on Facebook that change your life.

For the better.

On Wednesday, I received the following Facebook intel from both my BFF, Jenn, and my blog bud, freshveggies/gingerleaphotography:

Jesse-and-the-Rippers

YES. YOU READ THAT CORRECTLY.

Jesse and the Rippers are performing on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. tonighT. (click for more info.)

Jesse and the Rippers!

As in, Uncle Jesse from Full House!

That'd be me.

That’d be me.

My beloved dog’s name sake!

This is…

…this is…

A decision I did NOT take lightly.

A decision I did NOT take lightly.

No. There are no words.

What…what are you waiting for? Go set your DVR! (I say “set your DVR” because I assume that, like me, you a) go to bed at 8:30pm, and b) with great pain, deleted a high-def version of Sharknad0, and now have room on your DVR.)

You’re welcome.

What TV characters from your youth would you poop a brick to see brought back to life on a late night talk show?

P.S. – If you need a distraction from counting the seconds ’til this airs, why not travel back in time and watch my AMAZING Uncle Jesse (man) / Uncle Jesse (dog) tribute video?

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Meet My Third Husband!

BMan-Gravatar-stacheWhile I hadn’t given it much thought until last week, it seems obvious now: If you fine Chipmunks got to pick between Adam Levine and your beloved blog hero, The Byronic Man, obviously The B Man would win [the title of Third Husband]. By a landslide.

In a way, it makes perfect sense.

The Byronic Man and I are so associated in the collective bloggy unconscious GotC-baconthat on numerous occasions, I’ve had people email me messages intended for The Byronic Man. People have left me comments on his blog.

To be fair, we started it, touting our likeness and joining forces on numerous bloggy collaborations. We even send joint greeting cards to bloggy friends, trade sheet-folding tips, correct each other’s typos… It’s a bloggy match made in heaven, with or without the votes to back it up.

So let’s do this.

Slide01 Slide02 Slide03 Slide04 Slide05 Slide06 Slide07

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Slide10 Slide11 Slide12 Slide13 Slide14 Slide15 Slide16 Slide17 Slide18 Slide19 Slide20 Slide21

Bloggers: Do you have a bloggy BFF / spouse? Or better yet, a bloggy crush (SPILL IT!)? Bloggers / All: What other adventures should Drunk Girl and Byronic Man embark on?

P.S. – Don’t worry. Starting next week, I plan to blog about something other than polyandry!

My Bed is Getting Cold

As many of you Chipmunks know, I have a long-standing polyandrous situation in my house. Sure, First Husband, Peppermeister, is great, but…Scrabble…is more fun with extra players. Cue Second Husband, Darren Criss (of Glee fame).

Things have been grand over the past year, but our bed is really, really big. So.

Enough chatter. I’m cold.

GoJulesGo-Cold-Bed

Let’s review the candidates…

#1 – My BFF, Jenn

My dearest wife Jules,

Jenn-bday-WickedAfter all these years, I know it’s obvious to you I was born to be your third and only (hmmm, we’ll have to work on that – we have time).  But perhaps your readers, like the majority of state legislatures in our fair nation, need a pinch of persuasion.  After all, they haven’t:

  •  worked retail with me
  • fallen in/out of love with my brother
  • fled to the arms of another man from dated YOUR brother
  • taken a kick ass road trip with me
  • nearly died with me

Okay, those last two are really the same thing, but I’ll make it count for two.

Jules, I was born to be your Third Husband, because let’s face it.  I got this vow shizz locked up like a three-peat offender.  In good times and in bad?  How much better can it get than our impending wedding date in the banquet hall of a Greek restaurant in Texas that rents its second floor as apartments? (B-T-Dubs, my first guest post as Hub3 – just sayin’.)

JULES + JENN 4-EVER.

JULES + JENN 4-EVER.

And bad times?  Let’s be honest, we’ve already hit rock bottom together.  Amazingly, I’m not even talking about vodka here.  On our road trip [from New Jersey to Georgia in 2002], you lost your wallet, like, 27 minutes in.  We were checked into the Blue Ridge Motor Lodge (I could stop here) by a heavily bleeding sexagenarian who begged us to take a plunge in his toad-infested pool (he really did have a surprisingly strong grasp on metaphor). Then our friend couldn’t meet up with us in Atlanta as planned because he was… oh, that’s right… IN JAIL.  And to top it all off, we nearly died.  On a cliff.  We nearly went over a cliff together.  Can’t you just see the Thelma and Louise motif on our engraved invitations?

When we I backed up on the freshly wet gravel, smack into the electrified fence that was then the only thing between my back tires and the plummet, and the passenger door was pinned shut by the… voltage, didn’t I demand that you climb over me to safety?  Wriggle between my body and the steering wheel, out the driver’s door, before I even THOUGHT about escaping myself?

Jules and Jenn in Savannah, circa 2002. Five days from near death.

Jules and Jenn in Savannah, circa 2002. Five days from near death.

And when the farmer in denim overalls, sans shirt or underwear, came strolling out to look at my handiwork with his fence… and you asked him where exactly we were…. when he removed the hay from both his teeth to reply: “Girly, you’re in the middle of nowhere…”     Well, girly, he couldn’t have been more wrong.  We could never be lost as long as we’re together.

So, in conclusion:

I, BFF, take you, GJG, to be my unlawfully wedded wife, to have (mercy) and hold (your hair back), from this day forward. For better (see above) and worse (ditto), for richer (I’m not worried) and poorer (we got this), in sickness (check) and health (too late), until Blue Ridge Mountain death do us part.

Love,

Jenn

#2 – Adam Levine

Jules-Adam-Levine

No, I don’t, Adam. Show, I mean tell, me.

Hey Jules,

You know what they say about guys with tattoos…

xox,

Adam

P.S. – I do yoga.

#3 – Justin Timberlake

Jules,

You knew I'd come back for you, Jules.

You knew I’d come back for you, Jules.

I’ve wracked my brain abs for a way to properly thank you for convincing me to finally bring sexy back. Are you enjoying my new album, The 20/20 Experience, which dropped March 19th? Oh wait, this isn’t about me. It’s about you. And how I plan to repay you…

Hugs and Harmonies (and more?),

JT

#4 – Bacon

My Jules,Pi Day Pie Bacon-2

Duh.

-Bacon

#5 – ?

Third-Husband-Mystery-ManThat’s right, Chipmunks. Here’s your chance to nominate someone else, or throw your teeny, tiny, adorable hat in the ring. And take it from Jenn: I’m very open-minded…

Submit your 5th candidate ideas [in the comments section below] by NOON EST Wednesday, March 27th. Polls will open Thursday, March 28th at 6am EST!

Brrr.

Brrr.

What Do You Get For the Australian Labradoodle Who Has Everything?

Dear Uncle Jesse,

I’m not sure you’ll recognize that today is special, when we shower you with gourmet, organic treats, long walks and hour-long massages. Or when we coo over and over again, ‘He’s a good man. That’s a good man. Who’s the best man?’

ToastToTwitterers

Oh. Is this not an appropriate excuse to drink champagne?

But it’s true!

Today’s your 3rd birthday!

Birthday surprises from your BFF, Shunderson!

Birthday surprises from your BFF, Shunderson!

Already you’ve been with us for 2 years, 9 months and 28 days. Now’s not the time to talk of my guilt over your silver-spooned upbringing, but rather to praise your genetic superiority and extremely reputable entry into this world thanks to your mother’s tireless research and your father’s stubborn allergies.

We named you after John Stamos’ character on Full House because we knew you were destined to be the cool one. And have great hair.

Have mercy

Have mercy.

Here are just a few of the things we love about you, Uncle Jesse:

BlogHer12-hotpocket-UncleJYou fetch your Hot Pocket toy when we sing the jingle (“Ho-ot Pocket!”).

You dry your tongue on our pants after you take a drink.

You have access to your kibble all day, every day,UncleJesse_eatslyingdown2 and only eat it when we sit down to dinner; then you nosh lying down.

You help Dad tune the guitar when he gets to the 4th string, every time.

You learned how to do Full House-themed tricks at 9 1/2 weeks old.

 (If people don’t believe the last two, they should play thE video!)

Uncle-Jesse-Tucked-Paws

Please stop touching me.

If you disapprove of someone’s petting methods, you lick them aggressively to correct the faux paw pas. They mistake this for affection. I’m sorry we blew up your spot, but you do it to us, too, you ungrateful bastard well-bred specimen.

Hello, Ceiling Fan.

Hello, Ceiling Fan.

Your legs are super long and your paws are incredibly fancy, especially when you tuck them under, or cross them just so.

You’re convinced the bedroom ceiling fan is possessed and/or omnipotent. If it’s been too quiet for too long, or something is otherwise amiss, we catch you staring at it dubiously.

I hope you enjoy this birthday tribute video I made especially for you:

Love,

Your doting and equally adorable mother

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So what do you get for the Australian Labradoodle who has everything? Well, you can make like a Shel Silverstein tree, and give. Please join me in helping friend and fellow blogger, Valerie from Nikitaland:

2013-pledge-for-pets-button

Note: The ad below the Pledge for Pets button is not part of this post.

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So I Work at a Strip Club Now

Yesterday was an interesting day at work.

Let’s just say my job makes me die a little inside.

Which is not something I usually get to say. Trust me. I work as a project manager for a pharmaceutical company.

Still dying over here.

Monday traffic and meeting madness aside, things were looking pretty perky by 9am. Because by 9am, I was staring at someone’s boobs.

Let me back that thing up.

I was meeting a brand spanking (ahem) new colleague to explain how great the department was, what kinds of things she could work on, and the dress code what to expect in the coming months.

The woman was in her 30s, attractive and friendly. The conversation started in the usual way: “How long were you without power [because of Hurricane Sandy]?”

Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I saw something unusual. Something not quite right. No, no, it can’t be, I thought to myself. I let my eyes dart down.

Yup. Yup. Oh my god. Black. Lace. Push-up bra. Cleavage many would pay to see. I felt my ears turn as crimson as her blouse. Of all the buttons to pop when she sat down…

I’m sorry. This is the best I could do. This is a family blog.

I had known this woman for five minutes. How could I tell her we’d already taken things to the next level? But could I make it through the rest of the meeting without saying something, and then hope she’d use the restroom? No, that was just cruel.

“I’m sorry I’d want someone to say something if it was me,” I blurted in one breath, “I think one of your buttons came undone.”

“Oh no, it’s just this shirt,” she said, swinging the droopy silk collar that dangled over her va-va-voom.

I said nothing and waited for her to look down.

“Oh jeez,” she cringed once she realized what I talking about, and quickly fastened the rogue button. She thanked me for telling her and carried on with her earlier point.

Just like that. I had to give her credit. A little while later, she bid goodbye,

“I’m off to meet with [Mr. Big Boss] now.”

“Great – it was wonderful meeting you!” I replied smoothly, wondering how disappointed the Big Boss would have been if he’d known what he missed out on.

Later that morning, I had time to giggle reflect. I gasped, remembering: This wasn’t the first time I’d seen someone’s bra at work!

My very first year on the job, a middle-aged woman I’d only just met grabbed me and pulled me into the ladies room.

“I need help! My bra!” she whispered, eyes wild.

I watched, stunned, as she freed one arm from her forest green turtleneck. I tried to figure out what was going on. Everything seemed normal. Except for all the parts that were totally fudged up.

I soon realized what she needed me to do. I reached down her shirt, grazing her moist, freckled back, fished out the dangling shoulder strap and re-hooked it to the front of her bra.

I left the bathroom in a daze. Twitter didn’t exist yet, so I saved the story for my sister-in-law-slash-coworker, who still fondly recalls Bra Lady.

You probably think this is the end of it. Oh-ho no. Peppermeister (Husband #1) read this draft post and reminded me of the crème de la crème.

A couple years ago, a coworker in her mid-30s returned from vacation in the Bahamas, eager to show me pictures from her trip. Call me crazy, but I’ve always been fond of vacation photos. Anything to escape the drab, gray cubicle walls.

I walked over to her desk and she pulled out a manila envelope.

“I hired someone to take these pictures while we were there,” she said, shy yet excited. “He said I could be a model.”

Each 8 x 10 photo featured her bikini-clad bod on the beach.

“You look amazing!” I gushed, admiring her toned figure.

She looked up and down the hall and then whispered, “I have to be careful about some of these.”

She flipped to the next few photographs.

And there she was.

Topless.

It’s been two years, and I still don’t have the words.

Anyway. Today I’m bringing a wallet full of singles to work. Just in case.

Crap. Now I’ve gotta stop at the bank. This is New Jersey. I can’t even get gas.

Have you ever felt like a boob at work? Any good wardrobe malfunction stories?

***Hurricane Sandy Update: We finally got power back on Sunday night! My mood’s as boosted my coworkers’ chests! Thank you again for all of your well wishes! …Annnnd just kidding. Power went out again at 5am today (Tuesday).***

Summer is Hot and So Are You – Issue #4

Cover Story – Kate from Old, new or true

Something old: Well, not that old, but never you mind. Kate runs a very fun ‘Scribble Challenge’ on her blog. This weekly writing prompt encourages you to hush your inner critic because you’re on a time crunch – you only have 15 minutes. Let your creativity wander in whatever wacky and wonderful direction it chooses!

Something new: Kate’s blog design! Go ogle. Go compliment. It’s snazzy.

Something true: Kate’s a med school student, an avid reader and apparently a cartoonist. If she tells me she models in her spare time, I’m going to jump off a bridge. Look what she drew for me us! (Kate, please tell me where I can send you some complimentary ‘stache glasses and slap bracelets.)

By Kate from oldnewortrue.wordpress.com.

Featured Article – JM from Accidental Stepmom

After a year and a half of bloggy friendship and two NYC meet-ups, JM and I have officially crossed over. Get ready for raging jealousy: I met #5! The infamous, hilarious, bacon-loving #5! He showed me his fort!

In case you’re confused, JM numbered her stepkids 1-5; number 5 is the youngest, and only boy. He’s almost 10. (I was put to the test on Sunday night, trying to keep the names of 2 adults, 5 kids, 2 dogs and one AWESOME 1966 Mustang straight. I think I’ve got it.) I met nos. 1-4, too, and they were all sweet, social and funny. And seriously handy when it came to housework.

#5 (putting leftover steak in a large Ziploc bag and getting some ‘juice’ on the tablecloth): It’s okay. It only cost $12.

I can’t think of any stronger endorsement for JM than the truth: Thanks to this Freshly Pressed post, hers was one of the very first blogs I read and fell in love with. My best friend, Jenn, a talented writer herself, will tell you the same. JM’s not only a wonderful person, but an extremely gifted writer.

She also knows the best pie EVER when she tastes it.

That Fun and Quirky Last Page of Every Magazine – Renee Schuls-Jacobson from Lessons from Teachers and Twits

Nothing says ‘fun’ like Renee. (Exhibit A: Her winning ‘guilty pleasure gift basket giveaway’ entry.) I had the pleasure of talking to Renee on the phone for the first time recently, and we had so much to say, I killed her car! For reals. Her cell phone was plugged into her car and both batteries died.

But Renee’s internal battery never dies (eh? Like that?) – she’s full of positive energy and humor, just like her blog. If you’re not already reading, please head over there and say hello. I’m a huge fan of her direct (yet often poetic), funny and heartfelt writing, and she’s got something for everyone (that’s what she said).

And guess what? Even though Renee just had to splurge on a new car battery because of me, she still sent this!

Thanks, Renee! Too bad it’s just going to collect dust since everyone knows I don’t drink!

The quality of this photo was saved only by Peppermeister’s photo bomb. Side note: This is as full as our wine rack ever stays.

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Why have one ‘stache picture in this post when you can have three?

Reminder: The latest mustache glasses giveaway contest ends MIDNIGHT EST on Friday (August 31st)! All you have to do to enter is share a ‘conversation bomb’!

Thank you for being so hot this summer, Chipmunks! I like to think you have made me hotter by association.

Summer Is Hot and So Are You – Issue #3

Editor’s Note: Your favorite blogger (ahem) did an ongoing slap bracelet giveaway this year, but the bracelets feature my old blog name, “GoGuiltyPleasures!”. For a full listing of all Slap Bracelet pictures and posts, please see my Slap Bracelets page.

Cover Story – Don’t Quote Lily

Lily is a relatively new blogger and a fellow Jersey girl, and I could tell you how sweet, supportive and fun she is. I should do that. Right now. But you’re not going to believe me once you see how f&@#$% hot she is in one of my slap bracelets.

I should charge you to view these. But why don’t you pay Lily instead, in compliments (in the comments section below)?

She will store your compliments in here.

Screw honey.

Annnd THIS is what I’m saying. Pay up.

Oh, Lily. Can I quote you on that?

This is perfectly normal, Lilykins. I mean, it is Tuesday morning, right?

Featured Article – Ruminations on Love & Lunchmeat

Love & Lunchmeat is badass. There’s really no other way to put it. Both she and her blog are fresh and funny –  as if you couldn’t tell by the name. She claims to have a favorite kid and has been skydiving, for starters.

She was also recently Freshly Pressed (i.e., featured on the homepage of WordPress.com)! And more importantly, Babs (my mom) likes her.

Here’s a sneak peek of what Love & Lunchmeat orchestrated all in the name of slap bracelets! Click the picture to see the rest. (I mean, the blog post title is “Because Bacon is Sexy.” C’mon.)

I hope this one is the favorite.

That Fun and Quirky Last Page of Every Magazine -  Erin from Catstache

You may recall Erin from her mind-blowing ‘guilty pleasures gift basket giveaway‘ entry, which earned her a runner-up spot:

And it’s STILL one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen.

Her chipmunkitude so does not stop there. She’s a very talented photographer (I’m especially fond of these pictures), and she just, you know, gets me. I mean, she recently gave this Pot Head something to really geek out over.

…I’m talking about Harry Potter. Why are you looking at me like that? My pupils are always this big.

It says my devotion to chipmunks, slap bracelets and second husband, Darren Criss, have earned me a Prefect position in the Gryfffindor House. You know that’s right.

Instagram and I tried to make our pictures pretty for you, Erin.

Erin, you put the magic in my wand. Or something.

Backcover – Peppermeister

My first and only husband, Peppermeister, is hosting a photo contest on his blog. Email or Tweet him your best pepper pics by noon EST Sunday, August 26th and you could win a pepper roasting rack!

Click the ‘stache glasses to check out the contest details:

He’s practicing safe salsa.

Summer is almost over. OMG. What are you still hoping to do? …Oh, what’s that? Win some ‘stache glasses? Well stay tuned this Thursday, Chipmunks!

This Post Is A Tease

This is Post #199.

And it is a tease.

I can’t help myself.

I mean – look at the types of things I have up my sleeve (ha ha. I don’t even wear pants. Like I have sleeves) for this week and next:

You have no idea how hard it is for me not to ask you a scandalous question since I’ve shut down comments on this post. (C’mon. It would be the ultimate tease!)

You know I love you. See you tomorrow for #200.

Don’t bother bringing pants.

Summer is Hot and So Are You – Issue #2

Oh-hoh am I ever looking forward to this issue, Chipmunks. Also I may or may not be wearing pants.

Given that I focused on lovely lady-bloggers last week, I figured it was only right to focus on steamy menfolk this week. Grab an ice-cold lemonade and fire up your Scoville scales because it’s about to get hot like Peppermeister‘s (Husband #1) peppers up in here.

Editor’s Note: For those of you still experiencing WordPress Reader issues, email help@wordpress.com and they’ll get you squared away. Thanks so much for the tip, Jess!

Cover Story – The Food and Wine Hedonist

The Food and Wine Hedonist (FWH) and I were destined to meet. You may recall this blog was once GoGuiltyPleasures!. The FWH contacted me back in January to invite me to guest post for his Friday feature, where he blogs about guilty pleasure songs.

That’s right, I said guilty pleasure songs. FWH goes far beyond food and wine. And even if he didn’t, I’d still read, because food and wine are my favorite FWH is hilarious. His humor is fresh and fun, and when it comes to making a fine meal or infused vodka, he’s the guy I want on speed dial. If you’re not sure where to start, here’s one of my favorite posts.

If you need any more proof of his chipmunkitude, check out what he tweeted me the other day (don’t you want to follow him now, too?):

Let’s just say I spend a lot of time wishing he invited me to his parties.

Featured Article #1 – The Byronic Man

He almost bled to death for this picture.

Everything’s coming up roses for my bloggy BFF, the better half of JuJuBees, the always crackerjack and sometimes cross-dresser, Byronic Man!

This week he wowed the blogosphere not only with his “7 Deadly Sins: Lust” entry over on k8edid’s blog (this is seriously good. Read it), but also by posting a couple clips of his stand-up comedy. Bloggy prayers were answered. Chipmunk wishes granted. Oh yes. The clips were -unsurprisingly- worth the wait.

But we still need to work on this.

Of course, I give myself complete credit for B-Man’s slow reveal to the blogosphere. Remember when he wouldn’t even show his swoon-worthy face, and then slap bracelets happened? You’re welcome.

I wonder what I can get him to do next. I think it will involve a chipmunk costume. And a synthesizer. And Pig Latin. Just off the top of my head ead-hay.

You can also click on this awesome picture I made to see the aforementioned stand-up clips:

But only if you like the finer things in life.

Featured Article #2 - 1pointperspective

I like to imagine Dave’s gravatar having conversations with Byronic Man’s half-face.

Dave at 1pointperspective is a riot. I don’t know what’s more thoughtfully funny – the comments he leaves around the blogosphere, or his blog posts. That is really saying something.

What’s more, he’s a fantastic artist. For k8edid’s “7 Deadly Sins” writing contest (which he’s already won twice, ahem), he also creates illustrations. Here’s my favorite – can you guess which sin this was for? (Just kidding, this one was done for another incredible story, Forty-Seven Shades of Pink or as I like to call it, Ode to Bacon.)

By D. Lovett at 1pointperspective.wordpress.com.

If you’re new to Dave’s blog, this is one of my favorite posts.

That Fun and Quirky Last Page of Every Magazine – MJ Monaghan

His gravatar is a perfect imitation of Darla’s (shesamaineiac.com)!

Many of you already know and love Mr. Monaghan. He’s one the nicest bloggers around, and one of the silliest (the highest compliment from this chipmunk enthusiast). Case in point: his uproarious entry for k8edid’s “7 Deadly Sins: Lust” contest.

If you need a friend -or a laugh- in this cold, cruel world, please head over to MJ’s blog (or follow him on Twitter). I’m especially fond of this post.

And let us not forget he is our best hope for getting In -N Out burgers:

Hello, Friends.

Back Cover

I’m woefully behind on reading your blogs, and even on responding to some of your comments. It humbles me beyond words that you continue to visit Go Jules Go despite my negligence. Thank you. I have vacation time starting next week. Which means I’m about to stalk the shiz out of you. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Now. Please shower these smokin’ fellas with attention and compliments in the comments section below, and/or let us all know what else we should check out in the blogosphere! 

Sometimes I feel like I love you so much I want to cut you into pieces and carry you in my pocket.

But I don’t have any pockets.

Because, as I told you in the second sentence of this post, I’m not wearing pants.

Maaaaybe you should try taking me seriously once in a while.