In With the In Crowd…Or Maybe I Just Had A “Cinemacoma”

Chipmunks, can we start by having a little moment of truth?

I am not cool.

But this weekend I did something cool.

I am still not cool.

And I’m cool with that.

On Saturday night, Babs (that’s my mom. See? Not cool) and I drove to Brooklyn for a screening of the short comedy film, Cinemacoma. Cinemacoma was written by Vanessa Marlowe, and produced by Maria Soccor, two amazing women I met during the My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours (MPACTY) pilot episode shoot. They both have impressive resumes, and quite frankly, I’m glad I didn’t know this when we first met.

Babs and I left insanely early since we had no idea where we were going, and wound up with 2 hours to kill. The neighborhood seemed pretty dicey. I’d gone online and found a hipster-y pizza place nearby, so was fairly certain our lives weren’t in danger. Babs was still skittish about the mean streets of Brooklyn, but I convinced her to walk “just one more” block while I diligently explained the meaning of hipster:

“You know like those girls in purple jeans with the wool caps that dangle jauntily from the backs of their heads? And guys with scarves, lots of scarves. And facial hair. Like if yuppies and hippies had a baby. It’s like… they’re like what Hot Topic is to punk, you know? They’re trying so hard to look like they’re not trying at all. Like what the hell is badass about shopping at the mall and paying $30 for tights with holes in them? …I don’t think I’m explaining this very well. But trust me. You’ll like this restaurant.”

We ignored panhandlers and souvenir shops, and opened a nondescript door labeled Barboncino Pizza. A thick, red velvet curtain slapped us in the face. It was heavy. Babs tripped. We shoved the curtain aside, and there lay a sprawling, posh, exposed-brick, hip-ass pizza place. We had stumbled down the rabbit hole, seen Oz, arrived at the pearly gates, or something.

Barboncino Pizza, photo courtesy of http://newyork.metromix.com.

Barboncino Pizza, photo courtesy of http://newyork.metromix.com.

The rest gets a little hazy, because I swear I really did see God: I had my first sazerac (rye whiskey and bitters, neat, with a lemon peel twist, thankyouverymuch). I’m pretty sure the last 30 years were just training for this drink.

I almost forgot I had a blog. ...No. No, that would never happen.

I almost forgot I had a blog. …No. No, that would never happen.

When 8 o’clock rolled around, Babs and I stumbled walked a few blocks to LaunchPad, a multi-purpose space that functions as a childcare facility by day, art gallery/film screening venue by night. We chitchatted with Maria and Vanessa briefly and took our seats.

Launchpad during art showing. Click for photo credit.

Launchpad during an art showing. Click for photo credit.

In Cinemacoma, Vanessa plays a women who’s watched too many movies, and can only speak to her husband in film quotes. It was a fantastic showcase of her impressions. During the Q&A session after the screening, Vanessa explained that she’d originally written Cinemacoma as a spec script for Saturday Night Live.

Needless to say, keep an eye out for these two.

No. Seriously. Start by watching Vampire Diaries – Maria just scored a 4-episode role! Yes. She is going to rub elbows with THIS:

ian-somerhalder-gq-feature-01

Do you ever feel like you’re cheating and hanging out with the cool crowd? …And, um, how do you define “hipster”?

Disclaimer: This post was not sponsored; all opinions expressed are totes my own.

Disclaimer of the above disclaimer: I really wish I was getting paid to mention these joints. Do any companies sell pre-made sazeracs?

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68 responses to “In With the In Crowd…Or Maybe I Just Had A “Cinemacoma”

  1. Wait a sec–what does ‘totes’ mean? Does it mean I’ll never be ‘hip’?

    How cool are you and Babs, seriously? like, SERIOUSLY (stole that from Julia)

    Kudos to you guys for being brave and venturing out. Also to your friends for their success. Vampire Diaries? Good lord. Remember me when you’re famous too, JD. (sniff, sniff)

  2. Holy crap! So you were hanging out with all my Brooklyn peeps. I wonder how many of them were there. I wonder if my Aunt Carol was there. Was this opening after 8pm? If so, then probably not. But I’ll bet all my acting buds were there. And my beloved Nora doesn’t miss anything in her’ hood. Le sigh. You can drive to Brooklyn. For this alone, be thankful.

  3. My Brother lived in Brooklyn many years ago (up in Croton area now) but tons of cool, hipster neighborhoods in that borough. Yes, some seedy places too. Looks like you found a good one though!

  4. I’m surprised you were nervous about going anywhere and doing anything. You seem quite adventurous and energetic!

    I’ve been called a hipster (then asked what it was). I think being born poor in the Ozarks (which is redundant) and being all DIY (digging through others rubbish to ‘make’ something to wear, etc) since the early 80s (baby punk girl) means that I’m not. Oh, and I’m not cool so…

    • Mwa ha! Another one fooled! Actually, I do love adventures, as long as I have a proper partner-in-crime (and by that I mean fellow lush, of course).

      You’re no hipster, you’re just hip (it’s true because I say so).

      • Wow! I believe everything you say cos you’re smart as a chipmuck! I hear you, it’s easier with a somebody to lean against as you stagger through town.

  5. You could totally rock the hipster look Jules. You already have the glasses. πŸ™‚
    What fun to rub elbows with the “in” crowd. I love to people watch so I would have been “staring.” I wouldn’t have been able to stop myself!

    • I almost bought a floral-Urban-Outfitters-esque scarf on my lunchbreak, Susie. I don’t know what’s come over me.

      I don’t know if any city will EVER top NYC for Best People Watching.

      • I don’t know about that. Boulder has some of the wackiest people in the World and most of them have their doctorate degrees. I recently saw a guy pushing a battered bike. He was emaciated and had long hair. I elbowed Danny and said, “Look closely.” His bike was probably worth thousands and his clothes were super pricey. It was his hair, hat, thinness and gaudy get up that threw me at first.
        Seth Meyers said once, “Boulder has the craziest looking people in the world, but what’s shocking is no one seems to notice. ” – Or something like that.
        You’ll have to come sometime and see for yourself! πŸ™‚ Roadtrip!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  6. I made my first foray into Hipster-territory when I went to the Bryant Lake Bowl in Minneapolis last October. http://bryantlakebowl.com/ Seriously! I, and my non-Hipster friends, were surrounded by women with knit caps jauntily-tilted atop their heads and vegan footwear and men with retro beards, skinny jeans and Chucks. I felt we were outflanked, out-maneuvered and out of our comfort zone…. until I spotted the “House Infused Chipotle Habanero Chinese Lantern Vodka”.

    You see, dear Jules, my friends and I were heading to a wedding and we were all dressed up – definitely not in the way of Hipsters. “Stuffy” might be a good description. But when I saw that “House Infused Chipotle Habanero Chinese Lantern Vodka” written in white chalk on a board over the bar – I knew… oh, I KNEW that I belonged at the Bryant Lake Bowl.

    We called for a round, the waitress raised a brow and asked if we were sure. I watched as she relayed the order to the bartenders – who raised their brows. The shots arrived, our party steeled ourselves for the searing pain of hot peppers hitting our mouths, throats and gullets….

    We raised our glasses. We toasted in half a dozen languages. We downed our shots like professionals (because… well… okay, we drink a lot). We shook our heads in appreciation of so hearty and hot a house-infused liquor. We raised our glasses to the waiter who MAKES the stuff, giving a hearty cheer. We took a deep breath and smelled…. Respect. We had earned the respect of the Hipsters.

    (…and now I must find a Sazerac… well, perhaps after lunch.)

    • I love you and I love this comment. May I please publish it as my next blog post? I’m not being cheeky. It’s great.

      I do enjoy the wares of the hipster demographic, too. They gave me pepper-infused oil instead of boring old crushed red pepper for my pizza. Without me even having to ask.

      I will overlook your tight jeans, hipsters. Bring on the fancy pie and sazaracs.

  7. It makes a great breakfast food.

  8. As much as I rip on hipsters, I really should have a definition for them beyond “I know it when I see it.” Although, I do have to admit that I’ve been sneaking in a bunch of their clothing choices in my wardrobe.

    • YES! Exactly! I’ve always prayed no one would ever ask me to define hipster, although now thanks to the fine readers of WordPress, I think I’m well-equipped for the next round of questioning.

      Be careful, FWH. First it’s a sassy scarf, and next thing you know, jeggings.

  9. A pizza joint named BarBONcino has most certainly got to be HIP! It has the word ‘bon’ in it and this housewife likes her bon bons. The sazarac probably gave you the right amount of EGO BOOST to hang out with the cool crowd. I’d probably need more than one shot.

    • Ha! That reminds me, it’s high time I get my paws on some bon-bons. It’s been far too long.

      I think the sazarac = 10 shots. No joke. I haven’t had a single drink ‘get’ me a long time. I might finally be a cheap date again.

  10. I do not hang out with cool people, at all…but then I like to think that I am one of those people who are so uncool that they are enviable cool. The more I drink the more I think that, too.

  11. This sounds awesome. For the record, I love hanging out in hipster neighborhoods because, while hipsters may be kind of obnoxious, they usually do fun things. Karaoke 80’s bowling? Yes please. Oh, I guess all the stuff they like ironically, I actually like.

  12. And here I thought you picked the pizza place because it had your mom’s name in it!! See, that’s how hip I am. πŸ˜‰

    Yeah, I am utterly uncool. And not in a hipster TRYING to be uncool so as to be cool again, type of uncool. Like seriously, totally NOT EVEN A LITTLE cool. But like you, I am totally ok with that. My “best friend” in HS was cool, and I used to dream and pray that I would one day be as popular and cool as her. I have no such illusions as to the cool kids anymore. We are all insecure and trying to make it in this big bad judgmental world. Whoa, that got all deep all of a sudden. Sorry about that.

    Bacon. Chipmunks. Mustaches. Booze.

    There, that’s better. All’s right with the world now. πŸ™‚

    • I think there’s a certain childhood picture that would prove this comment false, Misty. πŸ˜‰

      I think one of the best parts of growing up is realizing that being uncool is way cooler than being cool. Although I almost didn’t start this post with “chipmunks” because I thought it sounded so uncool. The hipsters. They got to me!

  13. Per Wikipedia:
    Hipster refers to a subculture of young, recently settled urban middle class adults and older teenagers that appeared in the 1990s. The subculture is associated with independent music, a varied non-mainstream fashion sensibility, liberal[citation needed] or independent political views, alternative spirituality or atheism/agnosticism, and alternative lifestyles. Interests in media include independent film, magazines such as Clash, and websites like Pitchfork Media.[1]
    Hipster culture has been described as a “mutating, trans-Atlantic melting pot of styles, tastes and behavior[s].”[1] Christian Lorentzen of Time Out New York argues that “hipsterism fetishizes the authentic” elements of all of the “fringe movements of the postwar eraβ€”beat, hippie, punk, even grunge,” and draws on the “cultural stores of every unmelted ethnicity,” and “regurgitates it with a winking inauthenticity.”[2]
    Critics, such as Armond White, accuse hipsterism of adhering to cynicism, nihilism, and associated amorality.

    And what makes you think you’re not cool?

  14. Jules, we both talked about our mom in our posts today.

    WE ARE THE COOLEST!!!!!

    Hipsters don’t embrace mainstream culture and by so doing have made mustaches (case in point: your blog), tight jeans, cardigans, dirty hair and not caring mainstream. Also they try to hard to not care. Hence, they care.

    Does that make sense?

    • *clink* *high five* Yeaaaahhh buddy!

      That is a fabulous definition. I keep forgetting they hate the mainstream, because they seem like THE MOST mainstream thing ever. (Don’t tell them I said that. Their feigned indifference intimidates me.)

  15. Thanks for explaining hipster to your poor, decrepit Mom. It’s cute/pathetic when the oldsters try to get down in a far-out and happening way. (don’t you DARE mention that Babs and I are probably the same age.)

  16. Think ya pretty much nailed hipsters, there called scenester kids over here in the u.k. Cos they try way to hard to be part of a scene that they obviously dont actually belong in. love the blog btw x

  17. I’m claiming influence on the sazerac and all feelings of elation therein connected.

    An excellent explanation of hipsterdom. I have a student who did a presentation on hipsters who said it this way: “If someone asks if you’re a hipster and you say no, you’re not a hipster. If you say yes, you’re also not a hipster. If you say, ‘I really don’t like to be classified as a brand or clique, you know? I prefer to be an individual and exist outside the mainstream and seek out the unusual and unique and vintage.’ then you are quite likely a hipster.”

    • Holy crap. I’m misspelling sazerac. I blame the, um, sazerac. Do you still want credit?

      Sometimes I wish I went to high school. Not just for the spelling lessons, but ones like these.

      • It’s a hard enough word to say, much less spell. Don’t tell the hipsters, though. Maybe that’s the idea of the name, though – once you can’t say it, you can’t have it. “Zazazac, please. Haha, I mean a Suhsazaraz. Sacaraz. Sazasaz… check, please.”

        • You know I actually said to the PROFOUNDLY hipster waiter, “I’m not sure if I’m pronouncing this right, but, can I please get the SAZ-er-rack” and he said, “That’s exactly right!”

          Obviously, I have won at life.

  18. I would love to hang with Babs. She’s totes the coolest. πŸ™‚

  19. Jules, your lack of thinking you’re cool makes you even cooler than you already are! I’m all for chillin’ like a villain (see? I’m cool JUST for slangin’ it like it’s ’98) with you, your mom, your dog, and either of your husbands.

  20. if you’re cool with not being cool, then you’re totally cool!! sounds like a great night… and i love that you spent it with babs!! πŸ™‚

  21. It’s next to impossible to get a sazerac in canada. It’s hard to export peychaud’s bitters into canada because of it’s high alcohol content and blah blah, be bloo bloo. I am jealous.

  22. Hob knobbing with the famous folk! Sounds like a fun time!

  23. “Scarves, lots of scarves”… such a prefect hipster description. I’ve noticed that the guys have been wearing capri pants lately, what. is. that?
    And yes, by having a sazerac, I’m aferd you have delved into this strange and murky world

  24. I am not cool either, but when us uncool people have a day filled with coolness the world tilts a bit on its axis and throws everything a bit off balance. At least thats my excuse not to do cool things. I don’t want to cause the Armageddon.

  25. I might actually be hip just by virtue of my un-hipness

  26. Richard L Wiseman

    That all sounds very cool! New York, Brooklyn, Saturday Night Live, Cinema.. going out anywhere, at all, any time…. Hey Jules, Happy New Year. ‘Cinemacoma’ sounds utterly brilliant too; let me know when the VHS release crosses the Atlantic and also when the sound track is available on a cassette.

  27. holdontoyourpants

    I feel a sequel movie should be made whereinwhich Vanessa and Abed (Community) create a rom-com soely quoting other ridiculous Rom-Com predecessors.

    … I would pay to see it, anyway.

  28. Pingback: A Comedian’s Survival | Go Jules Go

  29. Dude…you ARE the cool crowd.

  30. You a rock star! You! And I SWEAR I’ve been to that pizza joint before, even though it looks like a million other pizza joints in Brooklyn.

    Do you remember when Brooklyn was not hip but the complete opposite of hip? I sort of do.

  31. So is a sazerac basically a manhattan without vermouth and a different garnish or am I missing a step here? Sounds like you guys had beyond a fabulous time πŸ™‚

  32. Being accidentally cool is like being Fresh Pressed in the flesh.

  33. I think my degree of coolness can be neatly summed up by the fact that I often use the terms “coolness factor” and/or “cool-o-meter”. Yeah. Probably not cool. πŸ˜‰

  34. Pingback: You Might As Well Start Hating Me Now | Go Jules Go

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