It’s Rachel’s Table‘s birthday!
Rachel is a fellow blogger I’m lucky enough to call a real-life friend, though we met through the magical blogosphere.
Back in April, when I celebrated my 31st 21st birthday, Rachel gathered a bunch of bloggy friends to write haikus for me.
Dear Rachey-Poo Head,
That was the Best. Present. Ever.
Chocolate bacon.
I’m sorry. I don’t know where the “chocolate bacon” came from.
I think about Rachel all the time.
I thought of Rachel when I texted my hub, Peppermeister, about Monday night’s dinner:
I thought of Rachel when I made last night’s dinner, and Peppermeister left me a bowl of his mysterious homegrown peppers. Surely I couldn’t put any in the bacon turkey meatloaf without trying them first?
Speaking of.
I’m not sure your present has arrived, Rache, so spoiler alert: It’s to recognize your Peppermeister Roulette (hot pepper tasting) victory against the man himself:
In all seriousness, Rachel is one of those undeniably special people who is not only talented, beautiful and clever, but always knows just what to say to let you know she’s there for you, and she gets it she’ll totally hook you up with the Amish bacon. I hope you’ll join me in wishing her a VERY happy birthday!
If you had to wear someone’s face on your chest, whose would it be (besides Rachel’s) and why? (Bet you didn’t think you’d be answering that question today.)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Go Jules Go 
Doğum Günün Kutlu Olsun to you then Rachel…!
That’s just Turkish for Happy birthday 🙂
Uncle Spike, you might be the man I’ve been seeking. Can you explain those Cadbury Turkish Delights? Bacon and chocolate I get (oh, how I get it), but those things… Yeesh.
Nope… Cadbury’s is a British brand and nothing to do with Turkey. I guess it’s like the odd flavour crisps they bring out every now and again in the UK – cultural strangeness indeed 🙂
Real Turkish Delight, or Lokum as it’s known here is soooo different to the stuff you see overseas. We have many flavours, all sweet – and definitely none with bacon!
https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSdqQXdilF1eQuK87_2i1RKf-WWk9PxOSeS7QsQotdI7cs0iFH8
🙂
Hilarious – I was Google image searching Turkish Delights right before I replied to you, and I was all, “Those don’t look at ALL like the Cadbury nightmares.”
I’ve had some of those suspicious crisps, too. And yet, England is still one of my top ‘dream travel locale trips’…
🙂
Thank you for the international birthday wishes!!
Famous now I guess? Hope you enjoyed your day anyhow.
Uncle Spike
Rachel (yeah, that’s right),
Happy birthday to you! I remember when we first met around an organic, fair trade and local (don’t even argue) poutine with polar bear meat. To me, it was one=ab at first sight.
Wishing you a glorious day.
Le Clown
Jules,
Make me promise to never write anything again before my first cup of coffee.
Le Clown
I promise to encourage you to ONLY write comments before your first cup of coffee.
Le Clown,
I assure you I have more than one ab.
Thank you for the (local) birthday wishes!
Rachel
Happy B-Day Rachel. Hope there are just the right number of peppers on your cake.
I am seriously planning to make an apple pie with peppers this weekend.
Not that I’m trying to impress Rachel or anything.
Thank you, 1point! Chiles and chocolate are one of my favorite combinations.
Happy Birthday Rachel!
As for who’s face? Either Kristin Chenowith or Jenna Bush. They both bug the hell outta me so I think it’ll be fun to get shit all over their faces like grease spatters and sauce moustaches.
Excellent point. I was thinking I’d go with ALF, but I like him way too much to subject him to vodka drool.
Thank you!
I find it hilarious that someone as benign as Jenna Bush would annoy you. She would look a lot better with a sauce mustache, though.
Did your second meeting take place at a nuclear reactor facility?
It’s Lance Armstrong’s birthday, too! Ohh boy. Maybe I shouldn’t have brought him up. Hokay, how about James Gandolfini? It’s his birthday too, yeah! Oh…wait…early demise. I’m going to stop right now. Habby birfday. *Hic.*
I have a Charles Bukowski t-shirt for real. I wore it while walking around Disneyworld to be CONTRARIAN. A woman walked up and had her picture taken next to me because her last name was actually Bukowski.
Do you know anyone in Seaside? That poor boardwalk. It’s like they’re being punished but I can’t connect the sin.
We like to meet up only at places that could double for “Breaking Bad” sets.
Wow. Way to burst a birthday balloon there. Heh.
Assuming locusts don’t descend upon the Seaside boardwalk next, promise me you’ll wear the t-shirt there, too.
I’m wearing Walter White on my chest right now.
How happy is Walter White? Very. And I’ll bet he thought it was going to be just another dull Wednesday.
This post deserves a haiku…
Happy Birthday, Rache!
Like bacon pepper cupcakes
Spicy, sweet — that’s you.
DP! This haiku needs to be stitched on a pine needle-stuffed pillow ASAP.
ASAP!!!!
That’s beautiful.
D, thank you, my friend
Birthday wish in haiku form
You know me so well
Hugo would like both you and Rachel to be his concubines. I can’t think of a better birthday gift.
Only if he agrees to iron our faces on his denim tunic.
I want Hugo – actual real life Hugo – hanging on my chest right now. Hugo necklace! It’ll be all the rage.
Happy birthday to Rachel! It’s my birthday too, so happy birthday Vanessa too! 🙂 I won’t say anything obvious like all the best people have their birthdays today – some things don’t need to be said, they are just known. Do I get some chocolate bacon too?
Get out! Happy birthday!!! (You might not want to read Exile on Pain Street’s comment, then…)
As for the bacon chocolate, ah, I’m afraid I have some unfortunate news. The…chipmunks…seem to have raided my stash overnight. Would you settle for some frozen peas and American cheese slices?
Thank you. I did read Exile’s comment – he follows my blog too and generally comments, so I’ll see if he says anything similar over there, ’cause I mentioned it’s my birthday on a post I did a little earlier. Frozen peas and American cheese?! I guess, if that’s all you’ve got…
Happy birthday to you, Vanessa-Jane!! Hope your day is great (and free of super storms and rubble-causing fires)!
Yeah, none of that over here in the UK!
Oh Jules, you are the best bloggy/real-life friend a girl could ever dream or wish for! I thought this was especially true when I received my apron last night with this note:
Dear Rachey-Poo, Happy birthday,friend; Cook in this and nothing else, but please be careful. Love, Jules
(I’ll be very careful)
Thank you so much for thinking of me today (and every day)!!
A haiku:
I’ve weaseled my way
Into your heart and blog posts
Now to steal the dog
R-r-rachey Poo! I knew you were after my little dog, too. (Side note: The vet just called with the blood/stool test results from his annual visit, and he is one healthy pupster. Yay! Happy birthday to… you!)
I can’t wait to add more photos to our Instagram Installment.
Happy birthday Rachel! Wishing you a year where you receive all of the bacon chocolate. ALL OF IT. Because, really, it deserves to be with someone as wonderful as you.
All of it? “All” of it?
Just want to be sure I know who my friends and who my enemies are, here.
I figured that I could count on her to share it with you once she receives it, right? If not, then my apologies for my gross miscalculation.
PinotNinja, thank you so much. I can’t even make a joke about words as kind as that.
(And yes I would share with Jules. And you.)
Well, I guess she’s OK and all. For a locavore. 😉
Happy Birthday to your bloggy bestie! I have had the privilege of spending time with both of you together in the same room WITH Uncle Jesse . . . and bacon. So, pretty much, I win! 🙂
I got sidetracked looking at our brunch pictures when I wrote this post. I heard you’re bartending the next??
Thanks, Misty! You’re okay, too, for a Ravens fan. 🙂
I heard you’re showing off your mad bartending skillz at the next bloggy brunch??
All I need is an invite. You supply the chocolate covered bacon. I’ll make the boozy beverages. Seems fair, yes?
I would get Rachel’s husband’s face to remind me every day of the one who came before me and stole my true love away
Ooh. Good call. Good. Call.
I heart you, Daile. You are my one true far-away love.
I’m totally into that Thor actor’s face on my chest but I mean his REAL face. He can put it elsewhere, too.
TMI?
It’s nice to know I can count on always replying to your comments with a little George Takei.
I like your style, Lily.
I’m awesome. You must be pretty cool, too.
Happy Birthday, Rache! May all of your food snob wishes come true. 🙂 Love, The Baroness
Happy Birthday Rachel! Or, as one of my ticky tacky friends likes to say, happy anniversary of the day you came out of your mother’s vagina! Cuz I’m classy like that.
And whose face would I have on my chest? George Lucas. Duh. But only if it was like, for reals. Everyone needs a bosom for a pillow. Even George Lucas.
Thank you for the birthday wishes and that vivid imagery!
Happy to oblige!
Happy birthday, Rachel! Yay, you for being such a great blog-friend, Jules!
Jules is awesome. And thanks, Hippie!! 🙂
Feliz Cumpleanos, Rachel!!! Hope you have a fabulous day! 🙂
It’s been great so far! Gracias!
Happy birthday Rache
And I think that I would wear
Martin on my chest.
Interesting choice…
And thank you!
I meant Martin Luther, of course… and I already have a shirt with his face on it…
Happy birthday Rachel!! I have wanted to try that chocolate EVERY TIME I see it at Whole Foods for the longest time. I had a bad bacon + ice cream experience so I have postponed, but you have me thinking it is worth a shot now . ..
Thanks!
I’ve never tried bacon ice cream. It just seems wrong. But chocolate covered bacon, I get. It’s like dipping bacon in maple syrup, right? Sweet and savory. Now get to Whole Foods and buy some chocolate!
And i just went out and got that chocolate bar. . . no kidding 🙂 it’s our treat for the baseball game tonight. i’ll let you know my review tomorrow 🙂
YUM! How was it??
UMMM AMAZING 🙂 I posted about it lol
I’ll check it out! 🙂
I REALLY REALLY want chocolate bacon now
Happy birthday Rachel!
Thanks, JM!
Well that’s just an impossible question!
Love when you talk about Rachel. It’s so cool to see online friendship that works in person too.
It doesn’t hurt that Jules is amazing, Nina!
Happy, happy birdday, Miss Rachel! I love how Jules and B-man coordinated their tributes with him running that picture of you as a teenage jazz dancer – fabulous!
Ha ha ha. That could have easily been me, Peg! Except I wasn’t cool enough to take dance lessons. My mother forced me to play the piano.
Happy belated birthday, Rachel. I’m new to Jules’s blog, so am happy that this is my first post here. Now where is my funny bone when I need it. I know it’s somewhere in here. *digs through purse*
Thanks so much for coming by, Sandra! I think I have a spare funny bone around here somewhere… Ooh. A Tic Tac! A little lint never killed anyone…
Oh, yum, lint! My favorite flavor.
This PG rated blog precludes me from sharing my comment about the pleasant thoughts I’ll have of you two sleeping on the couch together (think tickle fight) while PM is in his bed alone popping peppers and watching the Three Stooges in peace, so I’ll just say hello. Hello, ladies.
Hello, Donald. No banning of pleasant Rache thoughts here. Nope. Carry on. I am.