Food, Marriage, Uncategorized

One Steamy Relationship, Coming Up!

Photo credit (before amazing annotation):

“You are trying to kill me.”

This is the quote [of mine] that Hubster, the one and only Peppermeister, used for his latest blog post*. The other night he made guacamole and salsa containing twelve Serrano peppers and one lethal jalapeno. I don’t know where these jalepenos come from (oh, who am I kidding? I’m married to the Peppermeister – they’re called Biker Billy jalapenos and the plant came from Cross Country Nurseries), but let me assure you they throw the whole Scoville scale off. They’re the hottest mother loving thing I’ve ever eaten. One seedless, spineless, centimeter-long sliver has me researching ways to exact my revenge chugging milk.

The perfect accomplice.

I’m tentatively willing to let this one slide, because otherwise I’ll get stuck on dinner duty. My husband is a great cook, and takes no small amount of guilty pleasure pride in measuring his peppers, insisting I take daily tours of his organic pepper garden, and trolling pepper-related websites. He’s helped me build an impressive heat tolerance, but on Sunday night, he went too far.

If I suddenly stop blogging, please alert the Spice Authorities. I’m pretty sure they can still be reached at 1-800-DIE-WIFE.

*If it seems like I’m shamelessly promoting my spouse’s new-ish blog even though he just tried to snuff me, I’m sorry. On a totally unrelated note, I have really high hopes for my Christmas present this year.

11 thoughts on “One Steamy Relationship, Coming Up!”

  1. We grew hot peppers the last two years but froze enough to skip this year. Needless to say, cleaning and cutting them up was a huge learning lesson for me: rubbing my eye (even after scrubbing my hands) and ruining who knows how many pairs of contacts. It takes DAYS to get that stuff completely off your hands. So 13 peppers? Yep, I’d be calling that number asap.

    Very fun post! Will be checking out your husband’s shamelessly promoted blog now… 🙂

    1. Wow, my husband would be very impressed to hear that! Although something tells me he wouldn’t stop gardening even if he was drowning in peppers.

      Thanks!! Too bad we don’t have your photography skills!

  2. 1800 WIFE DIE – that’s golden!!! I’ll check out hubby’s blog. I like some heat, but really don’t think I could do all those peppers in one dish.

    1. Thank you from both of us!! Too much heat definitely steals the show, in a really obnoxious, ‘get out of my spotlight, Nancy Kerrigan’ kind of way. I don’t think ANYONE could handle this jalepeno! It’s ungodly. Unnatural. I need to look into it before someone really gets hurt.

  3. My wife and I used to have to get used to each other’s seasonings. I was always cooking a bit too hot for her and one day a week after marrying her I came home to find her and her mother grinding and freezing fresh garlic. How much? Three BOXES… that’s hundreds of cloves. Ever had garlic and honey preserves to thwart a cold?

    1. Wow!! Now that’s a love of garlic. I’ve definitely had tea with honey (and with whiskey, ha!) for a cold, but never garlic and honey preserves. That sounds like it could be good. There’s a small restaurant chain in NJ (The Garlic Rose) that focuses on garlic for every dish – even garlic vanilla ice cream!

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