Are Polygamist Pumpkins Legal?

Whew, I’m exhausted from sorting through all of the entries to my Halloween contest! I barely had time to dust off my slutty chipmunk costume.

Ha ha ha. Just kidding.

There were only two entries.

And I loved them all both. Almost as much as I love my sister wife and our 47 children.


My real-life sister and I took things to the next level this Halloween.

In fact, I loved your entries so much that I tossed them into my cauldron and brewed up a batch of winning for everyone!  That’s right. For the first time in Go Jules Go Halloween contest history, I’ve combined your entries into a single jack-o-lantern carving!

Congratulations Lone Grey Squirrel and Peg-o-Legs Ramblings! You WON!

In response to my question, How would the world look if YOU were in charge?, you submitted the following gems:



Now that we have our winners, it’s time to get down to carving business. As usual, I was filled with self-doubt. Could I come up with a design worthy of Peg-o-Leg and Lone Grey Squirrel’s submissions? My fears compounded after visiting Rise of the Jack-o-Lanterns.


Babs (mom) isn’t sure I can hack it.


Most of the carvings were a YUUGE hit. This one was just a six.

Based on Peg-o-Leg’s comment that if she ruled the world all IRS employees would have to wear the same uniform, the Julesie Crest Ensemble, I began my design.


Next, the design transfer.

And lastly, the expert carving.


If only you could see what my floor looked like at this moment.

Okay, so maybe you’re not impressed. Just wait until you hear what this REALLY is. A hacked up gourd? Oh, no, no, no.

In homage to Lone Grey Squirrel’s entry, this pumpkin is THE ultimate teaching tool for any Cat Sensitivity Training program – the only program of its kind aimed at reducing squirrel and chipmunk anxiety. If the felines fail to pay attention, all you need to do is turn out the lights, fire up a match, and BAM!


A chipmunk crest will be forever emblazoned in their vision, turning them immediately vegetarian.



Don’t let #47 stay up too late eating candy.



15 responses to “Are Polygamist Pumpkins Legal?

  1. I would vote for any of you ladies. This upcoming election is giving me anxiety. May the less, worst person win! Does that even make sense?

  2. Fantastic! I think your squirrel carving is (very nearly) as (almost) good as (nearly there) those Rise of the Jack-o-Lanterns ones. And I mean that.

  3. Your carving is da-diggidy bomb! And so are your costumes – totes amaze-balls, Miss Julesie!

  4. You crack me up. Happy Halloween! May all the fun ghoulish stuff entertain you tonight. And, I would like to see the answer to Peg’s question! 🙂

    • Aw, shucks, thank you! There are so many ghouls to go around this Halloween-election season, I’m not quite sure where to turn. Luckily, there’s also wine. Nature’s true equalizer.

  5. Haha Jules! That’s quite the creative effort with that pumpkin! Love it. But perhaps next time, you could give the squirrel sharp vampire fangs. No harm in giving the pesky, species harassing cats a little scare. Thanks for doing it though. When us squirrels take over, we will remember your kind deed and spare you from working in our nut mines.

  6. You’ve mastered the art of writing an irresistible headline. I love the costume. Hope you had a great Halloween.

  7. Sorry I missed this contest, Jules! Oh well. I’ve been buried deep in all the things life throws at a person, but I needed to carve out some time to visit my Peeps! Miss you!❤

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