Kvetching, PSAs

My Bra Is Stuffed (But I’m Still Hungry)

***DISCLAIMER: This post was not sponsored (except by my growing bum). All opinions expressed are my own.***

I’ve got something special in my bra, Chipmunks.

Also a Fitbit.

What the sugar-free fudge is a Fitbit? Thanks for asking. It’s basically a pedometer on crack.

The only thing I HAVEN'T tried to lose weight.
The only thing I HAVEN’T tried to lose weight.

Two weeks ago, a colleague showed me a nifty little device, about the size of a money clip, attached to her belt. “It tells you how many calories you can still eat for the day! It even monitors your sleep!” she said. Much like how Anna made pickle juice sound delicious in my last blog contest, the seed was planted. I wanted one. Bad.


“It costs about 100 bucks,” she continued.

Yeesh, never mind, I thought. Surely with my 40 mile/week fitness regimen, I can lose weight for free.

Except I couldn’t. I’d been stuck in a plateau, halfway to my weight loss goal, for almost two years.

I was sick and tired of taking blog photos from only certain angles.

Do you think Adam finds this acceptable?
Do you think Adam finds this acceptable?

Of not wanting my profile captured.

Ah, those carefree, go-ahead-take-a-picture-from-any-angle days!
Ah, those carefree, single-chinned days!

Don’t even get me started on full body shots and bathing suits!

Back in 2005, I thought I could even get away with a fanny back.
Back in 2005, I thought I could even get away with a fanny back.

To make matters worse, I couldn’t throw a Twinkie without hitting someone ridiculously fit. My sister just finished her ten thousandth triathlon in first place, my oldest friend voluntarily ran up a mountain in Colorado, Rachel’s Table did Insanity, Girl on the Contrary signed up for The Betty Rocker Challenge, The Byronic Man ran two half marathons, and Truth and Cake completed Tough Mudder. Just to name a few.

Just... just try it again. It'll go through.
Just… just try it again. It’ll go through.

On Thursday morning, I hopped on my whore of a scale and the writing was on the wall. An hour later, one thing was already lighter. My wallet.

And now this little piece of black plastic between my breasts tracks my every move, dictating my remaining caloric allowance based on activity, height, weight, age and gender. (Provided I honestly report my food intake using my Fitbit online account.)

Thankfully, for the project manager in me, it displays all of these goodies in some pretty neat dashboards and charts, which I can view on my computer or smart phone.


It wasn’t long before I realized I was a walking stereotype (pun intended). Despite my self-proclaimed diet savvy, I was severely underestimating my calorie consumption.

Yikes. Guess I should cut back on the zucchini.
Yikes. Guess I should cut back on the zucchini.

I even signed up for a trial premium subscription to check out how I compared to other Fitbit users in my country.

Competitive? Moi?

So now that I know every calorie going in and out, how am I doing?


I'm not even sober, hungry and cranky!
I’m not even sober, hungry and cranky!

Have you ever used any fitness gadgets? What are your dieting pitfalls and how do you cope?


98 thoughts on “My Bra Is Stuffed (But I’m Still Hungry)”

  1. I use a Polar HRM when I work out and I used to use My Fitness Pal to track my food intake and calories. But now after 12 months I have it under control and don’t need to track it anymore (and alcohol doesn’t have calories, right? RIGHT??!!)

  2. You’re a nut. So entertaining. I’ve given up sugar and that was crazy hard for a sugar addict like myself. But I’ve been in my skinny jeans ever since and I have tons of cream and butter and bacon in my diet. Took a while but I don’t even crave dessert these days.

    1. Ha! Why thank you. That’s awesome – that must’ve been TOUGH. But bacon makes it all worthwhile. I did this ‘all organic’ diet several years back, and unexpectedly, it totally killed my sweet tooth. I think my main pitfalls now are booze and carby-cheesy combos like pizza, calzones and bagels with cream cheese. <—How New York/New Jersey am I?

      1. Calzone? Yumm. We’ve just returned from a month in Italy where I had calzone for the 1st time. Heaven! You are from New York? Haha so Seinfeld was accurate. I only knew about calzone from that show haha.
        We don’t have bagels here in the land of Oz either. But Americans seem to talk about them all the time. They must be yummy.

  3. I’ve never used any fitness gadgets! Unless you count the TV remote control which I use to turn on to watch semi-naked men working out; that gets the heart rate going, and fitness is really just about getting the heart rate going right? Also, I never sit still, even when I’m sitting, I’m shuffling around, so I’m like my own fitness gadget. So yeah, actually, it’s all about the fitness gadgets with me.

    1. You always have the best ideas. Can you image how well that work-out would sell? Actually, do you think there are fitness classes marketed as being led by super hot guys you can ogle? Or is that implicit when you shop around for classes?

        1. We just had junk removed and there was a company called “Hot College Hunks Haul Junk” (did I tell you that? I feel like I did) – it’s brilliant. We need to get on them, I mean, on that.

  4. I’ll bet Adam has a fitbit. In fact, I’ll bet he’s got a few to color-coordinate with whatever he’s wearing. $100 means nothing to him, I’m sure.

    When I was growing up, my mom had a mechanical “exercise” bicycle. Plug it in and the small motor actually peddles for you, simultaneously with a scissor motion that brought the handlebars and the seat close together and then further apart. A ridiculous device. It was effortless, as everything was done for you. Consequently, mom never dropped a pound. What a scam. We (the kids) thought it was like a ride at Disneyland and fought for our turn.

    I have no need for gadgets, as I don’t seem to have a propensity to gain weight as readily as most people. But, believe me, I haven’t escaped unscathed. I hang on my cross for some pretty awful things. You can’t imagine! It’s just that weight-gain isn’t one of them.

    1. Oh my. You tease. My vices are plentiful as well, it’s just that, sadly, I look at a bagel and seem to gain weight. I also have this bad habit of looking around thinking, “Is it like this for everyone? Is this normal? Is it supposed to be this hard?!?!” Even keeping it to 2,000 calories/day is hard for me. (That vodka adds up FAST.)

      I bet it’s not hard for Adam, though.

  5. I’m sad that I didn’t make the cut for your list of fellow bloggers working on fitness, but then again I’ve been so wrapped up in my diet that I haven’t been blogging, so how would you have known? I also haven’t had a drink in a month (Cuervo stock down three points; a coincidence?). My best weight loss gadget is my fork. I have vowed to put it down after each bite, finish all the food in my mouth, and take a sip of water before picking it up for another bite. Sometimes I even wait an additional 5 or 10 seconds before picking it back up. Having come from a family where competitive eating was required if you wanted seconds, I’ve always inhaled my food. Now that I’m a grown-assed man, it’s time to slow down and actually taste the food.

    1. That’s awesome, Dave! Diets can get a little consuming (no pun intended), can’t they? For me, right now, it’s actually a positive shift of focus, but I always become borderline (if not entirely) obsessive.

      I definitely eat too quickly, so I admire you for slowing it down.

    2. I have eaten ridiculously fast my entire life. I’m like a dog: focused. All business. Chewing is what you do while you load up the next bite. I’ve been trying various tricks to slow my eating. Set the fork down. Take a breath. Maybe, um, chew and swallow?

  6. “whore of a scale” So true. I hate that scale more and more each day.

    I once had a Nike gadget that was stuck to my sneaker when I ran. It uploaded exactly how many miles I ran to facebook. Y’know, so all my facebook friends can see I actually did run. Didn’t last very long due to my pretzel foot.

    I’m with Dave with the fork thing. I am trying SO hard to just not eat as much. I have the best intentions every morning. “Oh, today all I’m gonna have is a handful of almonds.” But then my tummy rumbles and I remember again how much I love to eat. It’s such a roller coaster ride.

    1. It’s such a love-hate relationship with that scale – the only times in my life that I’ve kept my weight in check, I’ve weighed myself regularly. I thought, this Spring, I’d finally nailed ‘maintenance mode.’ I stopped weighing myself for two months and what happened? I gained 10 lbs. UG!

      You can publish your Fitbit stats to FB/Twitter, too, but I don’t want to make everyone jealz. ha ha ha And you take it easy on that pretzel foot, woman!

      UG! Yes. My stomach was growling so much yesterday and I was getting SO pissed at the Fitbit. “F— you it’s noon and I can only eat 600 more calories today! I’m starving!!!” I went for a walk in 100 degree heat JUST so I could have a drink and eat popcorn at 8pm. That’s wrong. But I didn’t gain weight. Damn you, Fitbit.

    2. I had one of those Nike fit things, too! I was totally addicted to it for about a year and have never run so much in my life before or after. But then it broke and I returned to my resting state of laziness.

  7. I was going to buy one of these! I didn’t know if it would be worth the money. The older I get the more I realize diet plays such a huge part in weight maintenance. It sucks because I like to drink my weight in red wine.

      1. That would involve running, though.

        I think B Man and I do have this unspoken blog rivalry. Our follower counts have been SO neck and neck for two YEARS – it’s spooky.

          1. Nope. Nope. You’re pretty far ahead on WP followers because our counts include Twitter followers. And FP’d FOUR times.

            Not that I’m keeping track of any of this.

            1. Oh yeah? Well MY post got FPd in “nostalgia” and now my count is leaving both of you…somewhere in the clouds with your feet on my neck.

    1. I knowww. I thought I could battle the bulge with crazy exercise, but as you know, I gained 10 lbs after a month of 30 miles/week (NOT in muscle)! I’ve read statistics where it’s like, 90% of weight loss is diet, 10% exercise. That pisses me off to no end. Because I like to drink an elephant’s weight in vodka.

  8. I tried the Adkins Diet years ago with great success. I cut out all carbs, ate healthier, and lost weight. Good luck & wishing you much success in reaching your goals!

    1. Thank you so much! I’m glad that worked for you! I thought my carb intake would be higher because of all of the booze, but it’s still pretty low. For some reason, though, my body still responds with weight gain after I drink a gallon of vodka a night.

  9. Are you putting in the booze? Cuz that’s what gets you.

    Oh, and if it makes you feel better, I have done none of those super heroic fitness things. The most I’ve accomplished is sitting in my chair, lifting a pretty heavy glass of wine to my lips . . . and repeat. Oooh, feel the burn.

    1. Oh preach, sister blogger friend. Did you see that ‘top foods eaten’ graph? That’s ACTUAL data from my Fitbit account – with 3,000+ calories of vodka alone. I won’t even tell you from how many days, but it wasn’t a full week.

      I really thought I was aware of just how many calories I was eating, but dang. Guess I can cancel my thyroid examination appointment. 😉

  10. How disappointing, I didn’t realize that alcohol had so many calories. I thought I could trade my 15 beers a serving for some liquor, but that doesn’t appear to be something that will work either. Sadly, diet is the main way to lose weight. I’m eating 5 or 6 smaller meals a day now and no carbs after 6, if I can help it. Plus the cheat day to get shit faced. I used the RunKeeper app when I trained for my half marathon a couple of years ago. It was pretty cool for a free app. Good luck to you! Oh and throw in a little bit of weight lifting. You’ll notice a change pretty quickly!

    1. Right?! I mean, I knew how many calories a shot of vodka had (about 65), but totally underestimated how many shots I was putting in ‘one’ drink… I’m trying to trick myself by using lots of ice, 1/2 the vodka, and watering it down (and I mix it with just a splash of grapefruit juice, the healthiest mixer I can stand), and only having 1 or 2 of those. It’s actually working out really well so far.

      Your plan sounds awesome – I’m very proud of you! I thought of you when I wrote this post. It’s really not easy; the exercise part seems so much simpler, but accounts for so little of the overall weight loss success.

      I do Pilates 2-3 times a week, but have been wondering if I should get back into some weight lifting. I have the weights (somewhere…) so I have no excuse not to.

  11. Yup. Even when I try to behave, like this week when I started this little diet nonsense, something happens that will derail me such as my best bud is suddenly in town and wants to get some beer tonight and then Friday there’s a work party to attend. Our awesomeness and desirability work against us as well!

  12. I use 90+ apps to keep me straight as an arrow! amoung them are an up band, ‘my fitness pal’, ‘gym-pact’ (this one actually does get my…rear…moving). An additional tactic in my fitness adventures is a profound joy of chasing trains as my morning entertainment.

    I’m much in the same boat as you in spite of all the apps I use, I’m 4’10” and stuck at 116…which sounds great until you remember how short I am. I was 136 a year ago, but a half marathon and a boot camp (Body Back by Stroller Strides) got me at least here…but I’ve been here for awhile now.

    1. Well, first off: a 20 lb weight loss for someone who’s 4’10” is EPIC! Congratulations! You should be very proud for maintaining that. But gah, aren’t plateau’s maddening?? Sometimes I feel like I’m fighting nature. And then I remind myself of the cave people, and how a human body is probably supposed to look.

      And then I cry over my watered down vodka and grapefruit juice.

  13. Hi Jules! I use a Body Media band (the one on the biggest loser, except my hubby and I have been using them before the bands were on the show). I LOVE it. It’s all about the math. Calories in less than calories out = weight loss. The biggest challenge for me was logging the food. Now the biggest challenge is eating less to make the math work, but the numbers at least hold me accountable and there’s no guessing. Totally jealous of the fitbit users and jawbone up because my band leaves a super fun tan line. Good luck and hang in there! I believe in you!

    1. Hi Christina! Thank you! I’m so glad you commented, because I was wondering what band you use. You always look amazing. Does it capture heart rate? Does anything? I swear I’d pay to let them put a chip in me if it meant I didn’t have to log every calorie manually.

      I struggle even with a 2,000 calorie/day diet. Do you think it’s the chocolate-covered bacon and vodka? Being accountable for the numbers again is making a huge impact already.

      P.S. – Here’s vain for you – I switch my iPod from arm to arm to try to minimize the tan line. Right now I have a hiking pack tan line. It’s hot.

      1. Chocolate covered bacon doesn’t add calories if it’s consumption is emotionally advantageous 😉 Unfortunately, the arm band is only supposed to be worn on the one (and the same side)–no idea why though. The bodymedia doesn’t capture hr. I have a separate hr monitor that i used to use. it captures calories, sleep efficiency, steps, and whether physical activity is moderate or vigorous.I agree, i would pay for someone or something to log my food for me!

  14. I almost bought a Fitbit Flex (the bracelet thingy) the other day because I thought it would help. Anything to stay motivated, right? Well, since it is $100 and out of stock everywhere, I decided not to buy it. I think I just wanted it because it’s cool looking. I don’t know if it will help me actually exercise or not. I do know lots of people that use FitBits and do well but … meh … another gadget that I will get bored with quickly. I think I’m going to stick to my bacon chocolate and booze diet. Hmmm. I wonder why I keep gaining weight?

    1. You know, I had no idea they were so popular! I had never heard of Fitbit until my coworker mentioned it. There were only 2 left at Target, and I can just imagine how pissed I would have been if it had been sold out, after agonizing for 2 weeks over whether to buy one.

      I think, for me, the decision to spend the money came down to: I REALLY started to wonder if something was wrong with me. Walking 30-40 miles a week and gaining 10 lbs? Whhaaaat? This gave me a HUGE reality check in terms of calorie consumption. Of course, now this means I have to live in reality. I hate it here. Meet you for a bacon chocolate lunch?

      1. Can’t hear you — I’m eating pie. LOUDLY.

        Good luck to you. It’s worth the effort to keep track of that kind of stuff. And, that PMP in your soul will be happy to see all of the wonderful graphics on the website. If you are interested, there is a good group on Facebook that is pretty helpful and there seem to be a lot of FitBit addicts. MLFC — Mama Laughlin’s Fit Camp.

  15. Do you LOVE LOVE LOVE this thing? If so, I must invest. Now that I’m 45, the weight is sticking to me. I’m like flypaper or something. Seriously. Misty should hang me in her kitchen and her fruit fly issues would be solved! Bad simile, but you know what I mean, yes?

    1. I think my relationship with the Fitbit could best be described as love-hate. It’s holding me accountable, which is what I needed (but dangerous because I tend to get obsessive), but I’m worried I’m still in the honeymoon phase. So far it’s worth the investment, though!

      P.S. – I JUST finished reading her post and I think it’s an excellent simile!

  16. I never used to keep sweets around the house, and I never craved them. Then… my wife came along. Once my sweet tooth is awakened from its terrible, Cthulu-like slumber, though… every excuse I can find. “Hm, perhaps an after tooth-brushing cookie or two…”

    1. See, I’m so afraid of that happening that to me. I may have mentioned this before, but I did this ‘all organic’ diet several years ago, and it had the -surprising and unplanned- effect of killing my ferocious sweet tooth. It’s never really come back, but I’ve never stopped thinking it might be in a Cthulu state.

  17. My friend has the wrist version. She wears it to bed and she was delighted to find out that she gets very little real sleep. Now she has the perfect excuse for undone anything. She’s so tired.

      1. I just wanted to clarify that it’s FoodDiary. I don’t want you to go to FooDiary and end up with some computer virus.

        I would show you a picture…but I’ve disposed of all of them.

  18. I think Gin is clear so it shouldn’t have any calories. Like water. Same applies to vodka. Why can’t the things I think be real? Why Jules? Why?

  19. Maybe if you lift the bottle 30 times before drinking from it, things will even out? I don’t do well with really strict metrics in any part of my life, so I’m pretty sure a Fitbit would drive me to jump on the next train to Donut Town. If I’m *supposed* to do it, there’s a pretty good chance that I won’t. Do you think there’s a reverse psychology one that says, “You must eat a whole pie.” That would definitely send me straight for the kale!
    Good luck with your goals, Jules. My mom was having a similar stickiness with the last few pounds despite the fact that she’s amazeballs at portion control and she stopped eating gluten, which did the trick. I don’t really buy into the whole ‘gluten is the devil’ thing, but I’m pretty sure cutting down on bread and pasta helps many people lose weight as a side effect. I’m a vegetarian, which cuts out a lot of caloric food choices, but does not protect me from the siren song of cheese. Or ice cream. Or chocolate. Or alcohol. Shit, maybe I do need a Fitbit.

    1. HA! I know exactly how you feel in the sense that someone strictly dictating what you should/shouldn’t eat makes you rebel. I start feeling overwhelmed when I hear about sugar or dairy or wheat or gluten or corn, etc. etc. etc.-free diets, and I wonder how I’ll ever figure out if there are foods my body really shouldn’t be exposed to.

      I would write love songs devoted to cheese.

  20. I lost about 60 pounds in the last two years by cutting out all the delicious food from my diet. Just kidding. I started doing things like parking really far from places so I have to walk more and also becoming mostly vegan — although this is also because my tummy goes into Terminator destruction mode whenever I eat certain kinds of dairy. I’ve also switched to mostly fresh foods. I also graduated college and stopped drinking every weekend. Actually, I guess I did just eliminate most of my diet’s deliciousness, but hey, grapes are tasty too.

    1. 60 lbs – GO YOU! That’s amazing. Do you have any favorite vegan recipes? I’m always so proud of myself when I have a vegan meal without realizing it. Like this morning for breakfast (fruit and a wrap with hummus, beans, and veggies). I think I could go vegan if it weren’t for my love of…well, all things dairy. I’m not sure it agrees with me, either, but… I don’t care.

      Rock on, my friend!

  21. Oh! And your post was super funny as always, a blogspiration if you will. (I was too busy being obsessed with myself in the previous comment to say this)

  22. Good for you, Jules! I’ve gained back 30 pounds. Not gonna lie – I’m pretty damn depressed. I’m still exercising, too, but not the Bataan Death Hikes like you. Why is a glass (or 4) of a crisp, white wine with some brie, some crackers, maybe a cheesecake or two…why is that so much more tasty than tofu and quinoa? (No offense, Rache.)

    I’m proud of you for all your hard work – keep it up! You can do it!

    1. I’m a little offended! Tofu??? Blech. Quinoa? Double blech. I eat REAL food, meaning local veggies with plenty of protein mixed in – in the form of MEAT, like bacon, sausage, and locally raised chicken and of course, lots of eggs. I even eat cheese!

      This is a tofu-free zone, Peg. And I would never serve you quinoa.

      1. Okay, I had to laugh when I saw this comment. Yesterday I made tofu and stir fry veggies for lunch – and usually I have it with quinoa – it’s one of my favorite recipes. Of course, I smother it in peanut or mole sauce. Vegany good times!

        And now we know the real issue: I’ll eat anything.

          1. OK, gotta admit, I kinda like quinoa. I just got some pouches of ready-made quinoa and wild rice with garlic and they are yum. my. Tofu? I’m joining in the general blech. Sorry Rache, for making you the poster-child for boring food just to get an easy giggle. I’m a laugh-whore, I admit it.

            1. Peg, I will be the poster-child for anything if it gets a laugh (I’m an attention whore). And you might be right anyway. I did just post about zucchini (perhaps the boring-est of all vegetables).

    2. As I just mentioned to you/Rache, I would eat everything on that list AND the quinoa and tofu. There aren’t enough Bataan death hikes in the world. (Seriously. I gained 10 lbs -of FAT- in 3 weeks, while walking 40 miles/week. I should get some sort of medal.)

      And you know what else? Don’t you think if you keep weight off for a while, it should get harder and harder to gain back, instead of the opposite? Like, shouldn’t your body reject it at first, instead of being all, “Yesss, yesss, come to me. I’ve got the perfect spot, right here on my upper arm…”

  23. I have a Fitbit Zip. I used to wear it on my bra but when I moved it to my jeans pocket my daily average steps increased by 1000!

    Come by my blog if you’re looking for ways to spend these extra hard earned calories!

    1. Oh! Steph (can I call you Steph? Next level friends?)! I’m so glad you said that – I thought this thing was off. I know for a fact one of my walks is exactly 6.3 miles, and this thing was clocking it around 5.5. BOO!

      I’m wearing it at my waist now, thanks to you.

  24. I have tried so many things over the years. Honestly, the one that has worked the best is…I had a stroke. Truly, that got the attention centered where it needed to be and I have cut way back on sugar, carbs, and sweets. My diet now is high protein and high fiber. I haven’t lost a lot, but I haven’t really gained any either in over 3 years.

  25. Jules,

    So most people know that a six-pack is made in the kitchen, not the gym… but I have always found that I don’t want to eat healthier unless I am really exercising (as in I can feel the effects of poor fuel intake the next day during my work-out). This is why I love signing up for events (such as races and such). It gives me a reason to train other than how I look– and once I am in “training-mode” I start to view food differently. That being said, my favourite fitness tool is still my foam roller. Not only can I massage out kinks and soreness from my work-outs but I can also use it to do nifty core-work-outs.

    Next event: A marathon that has more than five-thousand ft of elevation gain… so if I stop commenting and posting… it’s most likely because I died. Cheers.

    p.s.- I’d be super curious to know how you like your new bra-stuffing.

    -Soul Walker

  26. Don’t worry, you won’t find me rudely being all fit and stuff. Save that one recent post about a 5k. But I walked that because running is for suckers.

    Also, I love everything about this post but especially your weekly food breakdown.

  27. I have had a fitbit for a year or more now and even though it has a lot of technical problems (like smelling like swoob lol) I love it. We should be fitbit friends! I’m not actually that sure how you do this other than through facebook but if you want my fitbit name is limitlessky and my email is erin.guerard@gmail.com

  28. I should also note that i don’t think it has helped me lose any weight (although i think i’m just meant to be fat at this point because i have tried everything except starving myself) BUT it has made me walk a lot more. I get a lot of my points at the moment bike riding to and from my part time job but on my days off i am more likely to walk wherever i need to go. I also do more stairs as well now. I’m totally addicted to my fitbit. Love it. Best $100 my husband ever spent LOL

  29. Jules–your comic timing is a gift. Im serious. The zucchini comment in the picture caption was perfection. Also love “pun intended” and many other lines. Now onto the POINT of your post— I didn’t know much about fitbit but I do always see (hateful) people tweeting about their stats. The dashboard totally speaks to my OCD side. I try to keep track of my food at least half o the week on myfitnesspal. It’s tedious but I for sure eat better those days.

  30. I recently got a FitBit too! Only since my budget is on a diet I got the Zip model, used, for like 40 bucks. I love it. The main thing for me is trying to hit a goal of 10,000 steps. On top of that I am striving to exercise in some form 5 days a week. Mainly because it makes me happier, and less crazy. I had to take about 6 months off because of my shoulder injury so now none of my clothes fit. And, because again my budget is on a diet, I’m not buying any clothes that do fit. Awkward. Regarding calories, I can do well throughout the day and then I blow it at night when I get home from work. I’m not tracking the calories right now. I need to. You go, Jules!

  31. For the love of doodle. I just tracked the breakfast I was eating when I commented on this post and now I “get” to eat 600 more calories for the rest of the day. I think it’s broken.

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