First off, I’d like to give a Halloween shout-out to Mother Nature, for inspiring New Jersey to dress up like the North Pole this weekend. Very convincing and well executed, Garden State. Who needs power and running water, after all? (You don’t need it to gorge on peanut butter cups, and I guess that’s what really matters.)
Now let’s get this spooky party started, chubby-cheeked chipmunks!
I heard you couldn’t get enough of my jack-o-lanterns, so I thought I’d share some more of my finest fun-est creations. I’ve been carving one every year for the past 15 years.
Furry-in-a-hurry chipmunks, do you know how hard this was? A month ago, I decided to run a little video blogging contest, asking readers to submit a 30-second video about their silliest guilty pleasures. I wasn’t sure anyone would want to play along, and was thrilled (T-H-R-I-L-L-E-D) when Darla immediately jumped on board, encouraging several others to make a vlog soon thereafter.
I loved all of the submissions, for completely different reasons. I had a prize in mind for each and every one of you. Everyone is a winner.
Except there’s only one winner.
This winner stole my heart while broadcasting from inside her closet. I think we can all agree her submission is hilarious – it even got Peppermeister laughing (and he doesn’t like to admit the things I think are funny are actually funny, even though they totally always are). That’s right. The winner is…
And now, I present to Deb her highly sought-after, one-of-a-kind prize: A custom jack-o-lantern!
It started this morning with a sketch – should I try to carve Deb’s guilty pleasure (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), I wondered, or go with an homage to her blog theme (The Monster in Your Closet)? Here’s what I chose:
That didn’t seem quite right. So, I thought about making the monster look like Mike Wazowski from Monsters, Inc.:
Still not right. Finally, I decided to make the monster a vampire-monster, to get the best of both worlds. He’s friendly because Deb is so sweet:
Next came taping the drawing onto the pumpkin, with Uncle Jesse (my dog) looking on curiously:
I transfered the outline of the drawing by poking holes into the pumpkin:
After carving, it looked like this:
And at last, the final product (picture taken, I should note, from inside my own closet)!
Hi Deb! My, you're looking winny today.
Congratulations, Deb!! You too are a guilty pleasure goddess. I would like to leave you with some Buffy dialogue about winning:
WHILE PLAYING THE GAME OF LIFE:
Anya: Crap! Look at this. Now I’m burdened with a husband, and several tiny pink children, more cash than I can reasonably manage…
Xander: That means you’re winning.
Anya: Really?
Xander: Yes, cash equals good.
Anya: Ooh, I’m so pleased! Can I trade in the children for more cash?
P.S. – If I stop responding to comments, someone please check Renée’s basement. (On a related note, if you haven’t seen her vlog submission, you really should watch it here. It puts the treat in trick-or-treat.)
Starting right here, right now, courtesy of goguiltypleasures.com!
The Rules
#1 – Tell everyone who you are, why we should care, and what your silliest guilty pleasure is.
#2 – Incorporate my favorite word: heinous.
#3 – Oh yeah, you only have 30 seconds. (Because every game is funnier when the clock is ticking.)
The Prize
It’s a surprise. I don’t want to alarm you, but let’s just say my pumpkin-carving skills rival my vlogging creativity.
Now, let’s kick this shizzle up to the next level and get started! And yes, this is my FIRST. EVER. VLOG!
YOUR TURN! (If you’d like to participate, but don’t have a blog or don’t want to post on your blog, feel free to submit videos on YouTube or directly to me at: JKSchnedeker@yahoo.com.)
DEADLINE: Pumpkin Season (a.k.a. October 22, 2011). …The contest might be over, but you can check out the winner and the AWESOME prize here!
I won. Everyone, I won. That contest you didn’t know was happening? The one where I try to top my own guiltiest pleasure geek out? Well, I won it. Last night.
Let me take you back in time. To last night, I mean.
I decided to order tickets to “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2” for next Saturday – the first showing, at 11:30am, like the old lady I am. Normally I enjoy ridin’ solo to the movies, but since they’re all now dine-in theaters around these parts, I feel a little awkward going alone. Thus, I told my sweet manly husband he had to accompany me.
“But I’ve never seen any of the movies,” he argued.
I merely grinned. “You have time to watch them all before next Saturday!”
“I haven’t read the books,” he reminded me.
His protests fell on deaf ears, but then he, like most married folk will eventually do, wizened up and busted out the Big C. No, no, geesh, the other one. Compromise.Condescension.
“How about you make a 5-minute presentation so I’m prepared?” he smirked.
“Yes! I would love to do that!” I exclaimed gleefully. I wasn’t about to let his sarcasm stand in the way of this incredible opportunity to not only write about Harry Potter in bulleted format, but also to use my knock-off PowerPoint software (thanks, Macintosh).
I got cracking right away, and at 10:30pm last night (well past my bedtime), it was ready. “It” being…
The most SPELLBINDING [less-than-]5-minute Harry Potter presentation you’ll ever see, sure to get any HP half-wit ready for the final installment!!!!!
Celebrity portraits have got to be the first cousin of fan fiction. I know a lot about celebrity portraits. Not because I know the name of anyone who does this for a living, but because I personally spent many hours drawing Kate Winslet and the various Dawson’s Creek cast members.
When it comes to sketching, people are a lot more interesting than plants, and celebrities are the
Rainbow Eyes!
ultimate muse. Drawing anybody borders on creepy, and if you’ve ever tried this yourself, you know what I mean. Even in an age of high-definition television, there’s really no reason you should know that your best friend has a freckle like a fried egg or that Kate Bosworth has two different colored eyes (okay, everyone should know that. That’s wild).
Even J.T.T. gave good brow.
I always start with the left eyebrow and eye, then the nose, the mouth, the right eyebrow and eye and finally the outline of the face and hair. I’m not sure if my interest in eyebrows created this pattern, or if it came about because of this process. Justin Timberlake has great eyebrows. In fact,
They're amazing.
all of the actors I like do: Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert Pattinson, Darren Criss and of course, Peter
Gallagher. No one rivals Peter Gallagher’s eyebrows. It must be a measure of testosterone levels or something. All I know for sure is you’d better have some bushy brows and nice teeth before you’re getting on my sketch pad.
Ryan Phillippe - it looks just like him!
You might be wondering how someone could be as blessed as me; unparalleled writing and artistic gifts? I understand your frustration. If it makes you feel any better, I’m also a really good cook.
Go Jules Go 