Chipmunks.
I really hope those of you with blogs aren’t writing anything good right now. Just try to hold off for a few more days, okay?
Because I’m sick.
And did you know bronchitis / sinusitis warrants opiates in the form of cough suppressant pills?
Whoa.
In my head last night, I wrote a whole post that ended in, “Is this real life?” In my head last night, I responded to all of your comments with funny, meaningful insights, like, “I can’t feel my legs.” In my head last night, I still had a voice, and that voice could SING!
Let’s just be glad all of that stayed in my head. Unlike this list:
Things That Made Me Cough Laugh About Being High Sick
- Reading the facts about the cough suppressants and finding out they dilate your pupils. Ha! And you thought mine couldn’t get any bigger:

- Telling the nurse, who asked for my family health history, that “we all croak from cancer”
- Discharge papers that say both “avoid dairy” and “eat yogurt if taking antibiotics”
- After the nurse felt my throat and asked, “How does this make you feel?” me saying, “Like coughing all over you”
- …Dang. I guess that’s it.
Now, if you’ll excuse me. I have to get back to High School Musical. …These kids don’t look high at all.
…Is this real life?