Family Ties, PSAs, Vlogalicious

How to Fold a Fitted Sheet by Babs

Hey remember when you didn’t know how to fold a fitted sheet?

Listen up, Chipmunks. We’re about to put the fitted sheet issue to bed.

You heard me.

Buckle up and wipe off your ‘stache glasses, because my remarkable mother, Babs, is about to live up to her claims.

Just remember you loved me first.

Do you have any impossible questions for Babs?

P.S. – How great is Babs, and more importantly, how much do you think I could charge to rent her out?

Slap Bracelets, Summer is Hot, Wipe the Drool

Summer is Hot and So Are You – Issue #2

Oh-hoh am I ever looking forward to this issue, Chipmunks. Also I may or may not be wearing pants.

Given that I focused on lovely lady-bloggers last week, I figured it was only right to focus on steamy menfolk this week. Grab an ice-cold lemonade and fire up your Scoville scales because it’s about to get hot like Peppermeister‘s (Husband #1) peppers up in here.

Editor’s Note: For those of you still experiencing WordPress Reader issues, email help@wordpress.com and they’ll get you squared away. Thanks so much for the tip, Jess!

Cover Story – The Food and Wine Hedonist

The Food and Wine Hedonist (FWH) and I were destined to meet. You may recall this blog was once GoGuiltyPleasures!. The FWH contacted me back in January to invite me to guest post for his Friday feature, where he blogs about guilty pleasure songs.

That’s right, I said guilty pleasure songs. FWH goes far beyond food and wine. And even if he didn’t, I’d still read, because food and wine are my favorite FWH is hilarious. His humor is fresh and fun, and when it comes to making a fine meal or infused vodka, he’s the guy I want on speed dial. If you’re not sure where to start, here’s one of my favorite posts.

If you need any more proof of his chipmunkitude, check out what he tweeted me the other day (don’t you want to follow him now, too?):

Let’s just say I spend a lot of time wishing he invited me to his parties.

Featured Article #1 – The Byronic Man

He almost bled to death for this picture.

Everything’s coming up roses for my bloggy BFF, the better half of JuJuBees, the always crackerjack and sometimes cross-dresser, Byronic Man!

This week he wowed the blogosphere not only with his “7 Deadly Sins: Lust” entry over on k8edid’s blog (this is seriously good. Read it), but also by posting a couple clips of his stand-up comedy. Bloggy prayers were answered. Chipmunk wishes granted. Oh yes. The clips were -unsurprisingly- worth the wait.

But we still need to work on this.

Of course, I give myself complete credit for B-Man’s slow reveal to the blogosphere. Remember when he wouldn’t even show his swoon-worthy face, and then slap bracelets happened? You’re welcome.

I wonder what I can get him to do next. I think it will involve a chipmunk costume. And a synthesizer. And Pig Latin. Just off the top of my head ead-hay.

You can also click on this awesome picture I made to see the aforementioned stand-up clips:

But only if you like the finer things in life.

Featured Article #2 – 1pointperspective

I like to imagine Dave’s gravatar having conversations with Byronic Man’s half-face.

Dave at 1pointperspective is a riot. I don’t know what’s more thoughtfully funny – the comments he leaves around the blogosphere, or his blog posts. That is really saying something.

What’s more, he’s a fantastic artist. For k8edid’s “7 Deadly Sins” writing contest (which he’s already won twice, ahem), he also creates illustrations. Here’s my favorite – can you guess which sin this was for? (Just kidding, this one was done for another incredible story, Forty-Seven Shades of Pink or as I like to call it, Ode to Bacon.)

By D. Lovett at 1pointperspective.wordpress.com.

If you’re new to Dave’s blog, this is one of my favorite posts.

That Fun and Quirky Last Page of Every Magazine – MJ Monaghan

His gravatar is a perfect imitation of Darla’s (shesamaineiac.com)!

Many of you already know and love Mr. Monaghan. He’s one the nicest bloggers around, and one of the silliest (the highest compliment from this chipmunk enthusiast). Case in point: his uproarious entry for k8edid’s “7 Deadly Sins: Lust” contest.

If you need a friend -or a laugh- in this cold, cruel world, please head over to MJ’s blog (or follow him on Twitter). I’m especially fond of this post.

And let us not forget he is our best hope for getting In -N Out burgers:

Hello, Friends.

Back Cover

I’m woefully behind on reading your blogs, and even on responding to some of your comments. It humbles me beyond words that you continue to visit Go Jules Go despite my negligence. Thank you. I have vacation time starting next week. Which means I’m about to stalk the shiz out of you. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Now. Please shower these smokin’ fellas with attention and compliments in the comments section below, and/or let us all know what else we should check out in the blogosphere! 

Sometimes I feel like I love you so much I want to cut you into pieces and carry you in my pocket.

But I don’t have any pockets.

Because, as I told you in the second sentence of this post, I’m not wearing pants.

Maaaaybe you should try taking me seriously once in a while.
I'm Going To Chop My Ear Off Any Day Now, Just For Fun

A Very Byronic Birthday!

I’m so excited right now, I don’t know whether to pee or squee. Wait. Do chipmunks squee? I mean I know they pee, and they give really sh*tty advice, for sure, but I guess there’s still so much I don’t know about them…where was I going with this? Oh, right:

Today is The Byronic Man‘s birthday!

You probably didn’t know that, because let’s face it, your blogger-stalking skills are just not what they ought to be. That’s where I come in.

(If you *gasp, sputter, gadzooks!* don’t know The Byronic Man, please stop everything you’re doing, tell your boss/spouse/kids/plants/Jeremiah your new garden bull frog [oh, just me?] you’re suffering from a happiness-threatening giggle deficit, and head over to his blog. You won’t be sorry. Oh and hey, while you’re there, maybe vote for me in his latest Question of the Week contest.)

B-Man and I, well, we’re like peanut butter and jelly chocolate, Balki and Larry, slap bracelets and martinis. We’ve been yucking it up for about a year now, united by our love of being awesome, adorable and more awesome the silly. From talking animals to dental hygiene to spicy food, there’s little we don’t agree on. When I read his blog, especially posts like this, somehow, the world makes sense again.

Now, this isn’t just some lame, “Hey man. I heard it was your birthday. Cool. You going out to dinner? Oh that’s nice. Have a good one!” post.

No, no. It’s so much more than that. More like in Harry Potter when they tried to get one of the horcruxes from Bellatrix Lestrange’s safe at Gringotts and everything kept multiplying. Yeah. More like that.

As far as The Byronic Man’s concerned, I’ve been working with a local printer and cardboard cut-outs are involved. This has been his only other clue:

This is my chance to show B-Man what our BFF-ship means to me. After all, he gave me a prize-winning birthday post back in April.

So, thanks to that very post, and a certain ‘kid photo’ contest I entered in May, I was able to make The Byronic Man…

The Greatest most unsettling Birthday Card of All-Time.

I learned how to do new things in PowerPoint for this.

You’re welcome, B. You. Are. Welcome.

How do you feel about giving/getting birthday surprises?

Chipmunks Forever, Just For Fun, Uncategorized, Vlogalicious

And the Winner of the GoGuiltyPleasures Gift Basket Giveaway IS…

Happy birthday to ME, fuzzy wuzzie li’l chipmunks!

Oh wait. This isn’t about me. Right. The contest.

You did NOT make this easy.

Click play to watch me announce the winner (and runners-up)! Or you can be a total party-pooper and simply scroll down.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

GRAND PRIZE – Renée from Lessons from Teachers and Twits

Renée, please consider this your open invitation to guest post on my blog any time; I know the below submission is only the tip of your guilty pleasure iceberg.

Renée’s Entry:

Okay, you know I love to break into dance. But that’s the small stuff. Another guilty pleasure?

*whispering*

I sometimes sunbathe topless in my backyard.

And there is a middle school in my backyard.

True. You cannot make this stuff up. ;-)

If you’re feeling a little sore from Renée’s victory, perhaps this picture will help.

Zeal has never been happier.

After Renée submitted her scintillating entry, I tried to Google Earth her house*. Here’s what came up:

Can you tell which house is Renée's?

That’s right, Renée, all of this is YOURS! ALL YOURS!

*If you’re feeling stalky after seeing that bikini pic, please don’t waste your time haunting the above neighborhood. That isn’t where Renée lives. And duh. Just email me for her address.

RUNNER-UP #1 – Peg from Peg-o-Leg’s Ramblings

Peg’s Entry:

My guilty pleasure might surprise you.  There’s nothing I like more than spending a quiet evening playing my favorite game:  Go Guilty Pleasures, the home edition.
~*~
First I obsessively click on your blog.  If I’ve left a comment, I see if you’ve responded to my comment.  Then I go click on the Recommended Humor Blogs WordPress page to see if I’m still on there.  Then back to your blog to see if anyone has responded either to my original comment or your response to my comment.  Back to the Humor page to see if anybody else I know is cycling through the list more often than me.  Back to your blog.  I leave a follow-up comment if necessary.  Then I rate all the other comments and compare their cleverness-quotient to my comment.  If anyone else’s score even approaches mine, I spend some time worrying about that.  Finish up with just one, teensy-weensy peek back at the Humor page (with my stopwatch to catalogue relative hang-times.)
~*~
Next comes the best part of the game.  I BECOME you.  I put on the Side Pony of Super Fun-ness.  I put my custom-crafted Uncle Jesse mask on my cat, Beeby (this part isn’t as easy as it might sound). I line up some champagne (actually Asti – I’m on a budget) and break out the bacon candy bars and Reeses for snacking.  I use mice instead of chipmunks as my life coaches because they’re a lot easier to catch around my house.  That may be why they don’t really give me any advice, no matter how many times I ask. But I pretend they do while I make funny, fun faces.  I get lots and lots of guilty pleasure from taking lots and lots of pictures of myself being blondly side-ponied and fun.  A lot.
~*~
Yup, for my family, there’s no more relaxing way to spend the evening than playing Go Guilty Pleasures.  As my hubby said to me just the other night,  “Why do you keep calling me Peppermeister?  Who the hell is that??”
~*~
Happy Birthday to us!!
I told Peg I was jealous of her side-pony, because it's longer than mine, and probably curls like a dream.

Peg – here’s your loot-for-a-hoot!

RUNNER-UP #2 – Erin from Catstache

Erin’s Entry:

I voted at that link you posted, posted to facebook (i’m not sure how i will prove this with my security settings) and my blog. I have twitter but don’t use it (that’s a story for another time if you get bored) and i got the tattoo and performed the ritual sacrifice.

I emailed you this pic but incase it comes down to bloggers voting in the contest, here is the link (see below for picture).

Now for the guilty pleasures:
I sing to my cat Alex every day when i come home. I even sing as alex sometimes. I am not a good singer so he’s probably embarrassed.

Speaking of bad singing i also am a big harry potter nerd and i used to be a part of an online Hogwarts website where you took classes and met other nerds. You would think that would be a guilty enough pleasure right there as it’s terribly embarrassing but i used to compete in a yearly singing contest there called HOL idol and i would actually record myself singing and enter the contest. 0________0 SO EMBARRASSING. I wrote bad fanfic too.

As perfect as a guilty pleasure can get. Did you see the tattoo on her hand??

Erin – here’s your ‘stachey stash!

RUNNER-UP #3 – The Byronic Man

Click on the picture of The Byronic Man in drag to read his entry.

Picking just one grand prize winner was a total drag.

B-Man, may I present your winnings. ‘Cause I know how you like to get drunk and dress up.

Honorable Mentions

Renee from Life in the Boomer Lane

Renee’s Entry:

I eat entire pints of coffee Haagen Dazs in the car as I drive alone in the car. No spoon. No napkin. By the time I’m finished, both the steering wheel and I are covered with ice cream. Yum.

AJ’s Mom from Bibeautyful

Click here to read AJ’s Mom’s touching entry.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Thank you so much, Chipmunks! You have truly made my guilty pleasure heart proud. Now – I’d better go – I’ve got a hot air balloon to catch!

I’m totally serious.

Photo credit (before annotation): http://www.sacramentohotairballoons.com/