This post came very close to being a review of the Yule Log offerings on Comcast OnDemand (Yule Dogs?! Hello! Awesome!). But really all I want to say is: I hope you have a very Merry Christmas! May it be filled with peace, laughter and love spiked egg nog, cold hard cash, and the satisfaction of looking better than all of your relatives.
My gift to you me? Why, a magical Christmas combo: my favorite holiday song, sung by the one and only, Second Husband:
Chipmunks with cheeks full of roasted chestnuts, you are in for a treat – a guest post from Babs, the very woman who gave ALL OF THIS (i.e., me) life!
You’ll soon see how the [shamelessness] apple doesn’t fall far from the [guilty pleasure Christmas] tree.
(Click on any of the pictures to enlarge.)
So, for years my (our) guilty pleasure has been to find someone/thing worthy of the most high honor of being our Christmas Tree Topper (the ‘star on top’). It started with Britney in her red unitard, then swoon-worthy Justin Timberlake, and another year it was NSYNCer, Joey Fatone. In 2009, it was sparkly Edward Cullen, and last year, the singing Bieb himself. Oh, baby.
But this year, to honor your blog, our angel is a… chipmunk!
Decked out in huge wings, a starry halo, and yes, her own version of a slap bracelet (it’s Second Husband!).
Merry Christmas!
-Babs
Isn’t that magical? (And yes, she adds the wings and halos herself!) You rock, Babs! By the way, for those of you who requested GoGuiltyPleasures slap bracelets before Monday, you should have them by tomorrow! For those of you who haven’t requested slap bracelets, what are you waiting for?? I’ve got one with your name on it (or, you know, 200 with my blog name on it)! Just email your address to me at JKSchnedeker@yahoo.com.
Chipmunks-in-a-trunk (tree trunk, that is), I mentioned in my first ever video blog that I would be bringing back not only the side pony, but also…
SLAP BRACELETS!
And I’m no liar.
They just arrived today!!!
They’re REFLECTIVE! You know, for safety.
I’ve got 200 of these puppies (dressed as rad, neon pink accessories) to give away, and you’re gonna want to make sure you get one! Don’t be the only one at the guilty pleasure party without the latest bling.
If you trust me enough to send me your address (and why wouldn’t you? Nothing says trustworthy like this), email me at julie.davidoski@yahoo.com. I’ll get one in the mail to you lickety-split.
All I ask in return is that you take a picture of you and/or your loved ones/pets wearing the slap bracelets and allow me to post it here on goguiltypleasures.com.
Chipmunks! We’re gonna bring back slap bracelets!! (…FINALLY.)
Cherubic chipmunks, today is the most magical day ever. It’s:
11–11–11!!!
What, you mean you don’t always make a wish every time the clock hits 11:11? And your favorite actor‘s birthday isn’t today? …Hmm. Okay. If you don’t think today is special, maybe we should talk about other special things. Things for which you will not be able to deny their specialness.
On this most bewitching day, I’d like to introduce you to [some of] the people I hold nearest and dearest. Also known as…
PeopleWhoRockMyGuiltyPleasure World
1. Babs
Don't worry. She likes surprises.
Babs is the Mommasita extraordinaire. She taught me everything I know about guilty pleasures, namely, how to harmlessly stalk celebrities. Babs also showed me the way around a Long Island Iced Tea (or seven) and how to write a proper greeting card. Sometimes I don’t even know why I bothered with school.
Babs is special because she agreed to have a third child when she only wanted two. Also because she makes people feel good just by being around, and she doesn’t even know it.
2. Peppermeister
Look at this little baby-faced couple (circa 2005)!
My hubster, the one and only Peppermeister, taught me how to embrace guilty pleasures that I might have otherwise been too embarassed to share (er, like this one). He’s also the person who convinced me to start a blog, and is there any greater guilty pleasure than blogging about guilty pleasures (as I’ve mentioned before, it’s like trying to stare at the sun)?
Peppermeister is special because he once told a college english class -before we were dating- that I was “appropriately feminine.” Also because he’s the funniest, most selfless person I’ve ever met.
3. Bee-atch
On one of our more conservative shopping trips to Wal-Mart.
My Big Sis (actually, not-so-big – homegirl has lost almost 100 lbs. in the past year!) knows a thing or two about guilty pleasures. What she does with Pilsbury crescent rolls could blow your mind. She’s an inspiration!
Bee-atch is special because she lets me live vicariously through her dating life and is super-fun when she’s drunk. Also because she’s the only person I know who can dish it out as well as she can take it.
4. Bestie
I don't know why she didn't marry me. Look how happy I make her.
Some of you know Bestie, a.k.a. Jenn, from our stellar interview on JM Randolph’s blog. More than 11 years ago, Bestie rescued me from the depths of bad poetry despair and told me to have some g.d. fun! From animals dressed as other animals to vodka to hilarious Hallmark cards, she gets it.
Bestie is special because she thinks it’s funny when I’m angry. Also because she’s one of the smartest, most talented chicks on the planet. (Let’s see if I can convince her to introduce her music to the blogosphere…)
5. SIL
What a nice sister and girlfriend this band dude had - wearing his face on our shirts! And yes, this is in front of the legendary Stone Pony in Asbury Park, NJ.
SIL (sister-in-law) helped me write an entire blog post, and in fact it’s one of the most popular to this day. If that isn’t guilty pleasure inspiration, I don’t know what is!
SIL is special because she remembers more things about my life than I do. Also because she welcomes people into her heart and home even when they’re trying to secretly date her only sibling.
6. YOU!
Duh! You are totally special, too! I mean for starters, you have impeccable taste. You are also overwhelmingly attractive, and that counts for a lot everything.
You are special because you knew me when I was just an awesome blogger. Also because you take the time out of your busy day to encourage your fellow writers.
P.S. – If you’d like to repay me for all the compliments, please email me the secret(s) to levitation.
Once upon a time, Mother Nature had a stroke and decided New Jersey was getting off too easy. Sure, sure, there’s tolls on the highways and you can’t bring beer on the beach, but…no scorpions! So, she threw us a heaping scoop of hurricane with a sprinkling of tornado. Nah, she thought, still not cutting it. I know!Earthquake! That seemed to satisfy her for a while, but when October 29th rolled around, she was restless again.
Mother Nature decided she’d start with a smattering of snow. Odd, I thought, but pretty.
Who doesn't like a Christmas tree farm dusted with snow?
Then…BAM!
FULL-ON SNOW STORM!
By the way, that ‘bam’ was the sound of every tree in New Jersey falling on every power line. As the most densely populated state in the U.S., that’s a lot of power lines. The snow was too heavy and the leaves too plentiful; giant branches bowed and then broke.
We weren’t anticipating a true storm (there’s no storm like it on record [for October] since the Civil War), so when it really started coming down and we lost power at 1 o’clock last Saturday afternoon, we headed out in search of a generator and bottled water (we have a well that doesn’t work when we lose power).
We encountered 5 power lines down in under an hour...which is how long it took us to go 6 miles.
We got the last generator, and it was enough to power the fridge. Not the heat or the water. So we waited in the dark. And waited and waited. We blanched at the news that 95% of New Jersey Central Power and Light’s customers would have power restored by the following Thursday, the remaining 5% on Friday. By Thursday?! That was 6 full days away! We had needs! …Like showering for work.
Guess who was in the 5%? Yup. That’s right. 7 days of flushing the toilet with melted snow and creek water later…
I’M BACK!
Of course, I have to return with a bang, so for your viewing pleasure…
Uncle Jesse in costume!!!
I'm not sure he grasps what a privilege it is to be a chipmunk.
There are many like-minded souls out there, which fills my guilty pleasure heart to the brim. For example, I discovered via Twitter that last Halloween Second Husband bought a squirrel costume from Target for his brother’s dog:
He's carrying an acorn! OMG. (Click on picture for photo credit, but only if you dare.)
Annnnnd this is why Second Husband is about to get upgraded to Soul Mate status. I mean, a squirrel is almost a chipmunk. Does anyone else see interwoven destiny here? …No? Pssh. See if I try to pawn off my leftover candy corn on you this year.
Hi cutie-patootie critters! You’re probably gonna want to play this while you read:
There is definitely something in the air today. Fridays usually bring out a certain level of giddiness, it’s true, but today takes the [ooey, gooey, chocolate-filled, cream cheese icing-topped, chipmunk-decorated] cake.
And now, I leave you with a fact that’s never before wormed its way into this blog: Ten years ago (!!), I met The Peppermeister while working at a special needs elementary school. We plan to leverage our combined awesomeness expertise, and barn, into an enchanting special ed summer camp within the next year or two (for realsies). Anyhoo, “Shake Your Sillies Out” was the best song I learned in those two years working at the school. Maybe the best song I’ve ever learned, well, period. What’s your favorite silly song? (Doesn’t have to be a kid song. I’m sure you guys remember this one from Ace of Base.)
P.S. – Why, yes, yes I did actually shake my sillies out before posting this. So enthusiastically that I forgot I let the dog out (…crud, don’t tell Peppermeister).
Starting right here, right now, courtesy of goguiltypleasures.com!
The Rules
#1 – Tell everyone who you are, why we should care, and what your silliest guilty pleasure is.
#2 – Incorporate my favorite word: heinous.
#3 – Oh yeah, you only have 30 seconds. (Because every game is funnier when the clock is ticking.)
The Prize
It’s a surprise. I don’t want to alarm you, but let’s just say my pumpkin-carving skills rival my vlogging creativity.
Now, let’s kick this shizzle up to the next level and get started! And yes, this is my FIRST. EVER. VLOG!
YOUR TURN! (If you’d like to participate, but don’t have a blog or don’t want to post on your blog, feel free to submit videos on YouTube or directly to me at: JKSchnedeker@yahoo.com.)
DEADLINE: Pumpkin Season (a.k.a. October 22, 2011). …The contest might be over, but you can check out the winner and the AWESOME prize here!
Oh you, my darling Guilty Pleasure chipmunk*, let’s talk. Grab a chair drink. Can I just tell you something? I’ve been struggling with whether or not I should’ve emailed you at your personal email address when you subscribed to my blog. I wanna write and say, “Thank you. You’ve totally validated my existence and if you’re ever in Jersey I’ll be glad to make you dinner and let my dog lick your face raw,” but it seems like that might be a bit too intrusive. (In case I’ve worried anyone, if you’ve written me to thank me for subscribing to your blog, I was thrilled.)
Related to this, I wrote a very silly post back in April (2 months after I started this blog) which I intended to post should I ever catch that rare, Freshly Pressed unicorn (i.e., get featured on the home page of wordpress.com). Well, shockingly, I did wrangle the majestic, one-horned beast this week -when I least expected it, natch, and had long given up caring too much about it- but the post was sarcastic and clouded the true gratitude and humility I felt in responding to the exciting flurry of sweet comments.
So, lest there be ANY doubt how I feel about you, and by you I mean those who’ve ever read, and/or continue to read, my little blog, and share your lovely, hilarious thoughts (so yeah, this means YOU! Right now! You!):
*I love chipmunks. So much. This is the greatest compliment I know how to give. Besides sharing my Reese’s peanut butter cups. Or my vodka. No, no. Sorry. I got carried away. Paws off the Smirnoff.
Go Jules Go 