Author. Blogger. Chipmunk enthusiast.
Listen up, Chipmunks. We’re about to put the fitted sheet issue to bed.
You heard me.
Buckle up and wipe off your ‘stache glasses, because my remarkable mother, Babs, is about to live up to her claims.
Just remember you loved me first.
Do you have any impossible questions for Babs?
P.S. – How great is Babs, and more importantly, how much do you think I could charge to rent her out?
This is it.
I started this blog in February 2011, but wanted to wait for a special occasion to share some of my favorite Google search engine terms. I’m talking about those unusual things you people type into Google late at night and think you’re stealth.
If that search led you to GoJulesGo.com, I know alllll about it.
Consider yourselves busted, you sweet, sick, twisted li’l Chipmunks.
Keep up the good work. I live for this shiz.
Do you have any search engine/internet stories? (PG-13, mmmkay? My neighbors read this blog.)
P.S. – I promise to stop putting up posts now. Until next week.
Happy birthday to ME, fuzzy wuzzie li’l chipmunks!
Oh wait. This isn’t about me. Right. The contest.
You did NOT make this easy.
Click play to watch me announce the winner (and runners-up)! Or you can be a total party-pooper and simply scroll down.
~*~*~*~*~*~*
Renée, please consider this your open invitation to guest post on my blog any time; I know the below submission is only the tip of your guilty pleasure iceberg.
Okay, you know I love to break into dance. But that’s the small stuff. Another guilty pleasure?
*whispering*
I sometimes sunbathe topless in my backyard.
And there is a middle school in my backyard.
True. You cannot make this stuff up.
If you’re feeling a little sore from Renée’s victory, perhaps this picture will help.
After Renée submitted her scintillating entry, I tried to Google Earth her house*. Here’s what came up:
That’s right, Renée, all of this is YOURS! ALL YOURS!
*If you’re feeling stalky after seeing that bikini pic, please don’t waste your time haunting the above neighborhood. That isn’t where Renée lives. And duh. Just email me for her address.
My guilty pleasure might surprise you. There’s nothing I like more than spending a quiet evening playing my favorite game: Go Guilty Pleasures, the home edition.~*~First I obsessively click on your blog. If I’ve left a comment, I see if you’ve responded to my comment. Then I go click on the Recommended Humor Blogs WordPress page to see if I’m still on there. Then back to your blog to see if anyone has responded either to my original comment or your response to my comment. Back to the Humor page to see if anybody else I know is cycling through the list more often than me. Back to your blog. I leave a follow-up comment if necessary. Then I rate all the other comments and compare their cleverness-quotient to my comment. If anyone else’s score even approaches mine, I spend some time worrying about that. Finish up with just one, teensy-weensy peek back at the Humor page (with my stopwatch to catalogue relative hang-times.)~*~Next comes the best part of the game. I BECOME you. I put on the Side Pony of Super Fun-ness. I put my custom-crafted Uncle Jesse mask on my cat, Beeby (this part isn’t as easy as it might sound). I line up some champagne (actually Asti – I’m on a budget) and break out the bacon candy bars and Reeses for snacking. I use mice instead of chipmunks as my life coaches because they’re a lot easier to catch around my house. That may be why they don’t really give me any advice, no matter how many times I ask. But I pretend they do while I make funny, fun faces. I get lots and lots of guilty pleasure from taking lots and lots of pictures of myself being blondly side-ponied and fun. A lot.~*~Yup, for my family, there’s no more relaxing way to spend the evening than playing Go Guilty Pleasures. As my hubby said to me just the other night, “Why do you keep calling me Peppermeister? Who the hell is that??”~*~Happy Birthday to us!!
Peg – here’s your loot-for-a-hoot!
I voted at that link you posted, posted to facebook (i’m not sure how i will prove this with my security settings) and my blog. I have twitter but don’t use it (that’s a story for another time if you get bored) and i got the tattoo and performed the ritual sacrifice.
I emailed you this pic but incase it comes down to bloggers voting in the contest, here is the link (see below for picture).
Now for the guilty pleasures:
I sing to my cat Alex every day when i come home. I even sing as alex sometimes. I am not a good singer so he’s probably embarrassed.Speaking of bad singing i also am a big harry potter nerd and i used to be a part of an online Hogwarts website where you took classes and met other nerds. You would think that would be a guilty enough pleasure right there as it’s terribly embarrassing but i used to compete in a yearly singing contest there called HOL idol and i would actually record myself singing and enter the contest. 0________0 SO EMBARRASSING. I wrote bad fanfic too.
Erin – here’s your ‘stachey stash!
B-Man, may I present your winnings. ‘Cause I know how you like to get drunk and dress up.
Renee’s Entry:
I eat entire pints of coffee Haagen Dazs in the car as I drive alone in the car. No spoon. No napkin. By the time I’m finished, both the steering wheel and I are covered with ice cream. Yum.
Click here to read AJ’s Mom’s touching entry.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Thank you so much, Chipmunks! You have truly made my guilty pleasure heart proud. Now – I’d better go – I’ve got a hot air balloon to catch!
I’m totally serious.
A year into this blog, and I find I’m older, wiser simpler, and just a little closer to embracing my inner chipmunk.
Yes. That’s right. Today is…
Someone should alert the Academy.
Furry-in-a-hurry chipmunks, do you know how hard this was? A month ago, I decided to run a little video blogging contest, asking readers to submit a 30-second video about their silliest guilty pleasures. I wasn’t sure anyone would want to play along, and was thrilled (T-H-R-I-L-L-E-D) when Darla immediately jumped on board, encouraging several others to make a vlog soon thereafter.
I loved all of the submissions, for completely different reasons. I had a prize in mind for each and every one of you. Everyone is a winner.
Except there’s only one winner.
This winner stole my heart while broadcasting from inside her closet. I think we can all agree her submission is hilarious – it even got Peppermeister laughing (and he doesn’t like to admit the things I think are funny are actually funny, even though they totally always are). That’s right. The winner is…
And now, I present to Deb her highly sought-after, one-of-a-kind prize: A custom jack-o-lantern!
It started this morning with a sketch – should I try to carve Deb’s guilty pleasure (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), I wondered, or go with an homage to her blog theme (The Monster in Your Closet)? Here’s what I chose:
That didn’t seem quite right. So, I thought about making the monster look like Mike Wazowski from Monsters, Inc.:
Still not right. Finally, I decided to make the monster a vampire-monster, to get the best of both worlds. He’s friendly because Deb is so sweet:
Next came taping the drawing onto the pumpkin, with Uncle Jesse (my dog) looking on curiously:
I transfered the outline of the drawing by poking holes into the pumpkin:
After carving, it looked like this:
And at last, the final product (picture taken, I should note, from inside my own closet)!
Congratulations, Deb!! You too are a guilty pleasure goddess. I would like to leave you with some Buffy dialogue about winning:
P.S. – If I stop responding to comments, someone please check Renée’s basement. (On a related note, if you haven’t seen her vlog submission, you really should watch it here. It puts the treat in trick-or-treat.)
Cheeky chipmunks, my video blogging contest ends today (October 22, midnight EST)!! You have about 14 hours to enter your 30-second video. By my calculations, this means you could do 8 billion (maybe slightly less) takes and still have time to qualify for the WORLD’S BEST PRIZE! You don’t want to miss out. Just ask Sprinkles.
In the meantime, I’ll be enjoying a lovely, relaxing Saturday with my two besties (b-day celebration in the hiz-ouse!), Uncle Jesse, Peppermeister annnnnd….a puppy!!!
My chipmunkalicious friend, Jenn, volunteers for 11th Hour Rescue, and is currently providing a foster home for a lil’ pitbull named Kelly.
Here’s Kelly. Get ready for an aww-attack.
Chipmunk-a-doos, this is your friendly, WordPressure-freefilled reminder that the Best. Video. Blogging. Contest. EVER!!! ends one week from today, on Saturday, October 22nd.
Check out my own vlog and the rules here.
You don’t want to miss this opportunity to win a STUPENDOUS prize! Just ask Darla. Or Deb. Or Renée. Or Leonore. Or JM. (I’m talking to you, Sprinkles. And you, GotC. And you, Byron. And you, Tink. And YOU!!!)
Now come on, get on the rock (yeah, you’ve gotta watch the vid for that to make sense)!
Hi cutie-patootie critters! You’re probably gonna want to play this while you read:
There is definitely something in the air today. Fridays usually bring out a certain level of giddiness, it’s true, but today takes the [ooey, gooey, chocolate-filled, cream cheese icing-topped, chipmunk-decorated] cake.
Not only was I positively thrilled to see (literally, see!) three of my favorite bloggers, Darla from She’s a Maineiac, Deb from The Monster in Your Closet and Renée from Lessons From Teachers and Twits, participate in GOGP’s first video blogging contest, but some of my other favorite bloggers also seem to have caught their own case of the sillies in the past 24 hours. Love it! <–Understatement of the year.
And now, I leave you with a fact that’s never before wormed its way into this blog: Ten years ago (!!), I met The Peppermeister while working at a special needs elementary school. We plan to leverage our combined awesomeness expertise, and barn, into an enchanting special ed summer camp within the next year or two (for realsies). Anyhoo, “Shake Your Sillies Out” was the best song I learned in those two years working at the school. Maybe the best song I’ve ever learned, well, period. What’s your favorite silly song? (Doesn’t have to be a kid song. I’m sure you guys remember this one from Ace of Base.)
P.S. – Why, yes, yes I did actually shake my sillies out before posting this. So enthusiastically that I forgot I let the dog out (…crud, don’t tell Peppermeister).
Lofty post title, if I do say so myself. But it’s only fitting for one who has Merriam-Webster on speed dial. They’re currently reviewing my latest submission, and I have high hopes:
That, ‘munks (as in chipmunks), is WordPressure. WordPressure reminds me of another knock-your-flaming-socks-off kind of pressure* (annnnnd that’s how it relates, in case this post title was still bothering you):
Much like guillotines, this is one of my more…eccentric…guilty pleasures. (I blame Buffy. I’m sure you remember that dance-til-you-die episode.) Rumor has it, this week, a man in Ireland died of spontaneous combustion.
Do you buy it? Or are you too busy thinking about your own weird guilty pleasure (ya’ll better DIVULGE!)?
*And by pressure, apparently I mean: a buildup of static electricity inside the body or from an external geomagnetic force exerted on the body (thanks, science.howstuffworks.com).
My sweet, striped, forest-dwelling critters, I am about to harness the guilty pleasure god energy that was recently made available to me. Also steal borrow divine inspiration from the current vlogging trend about accents.
#1 – Tell everyone who you are, why we should care, and what your silliest guilty pleasure is.
#2 – Incorporate my favorite word: heinous.
#3 – Oh yeah, you only have 30 seconds. (Because every game is funnier when the clock is ticking.)
It’s a surprise. I don’t want to alarm you, but let’s just say my pumpkin-carving skills rival my vlogging creativity.
Now, let’s kick this shizzle up to the next level and get started! And yes, this is my FIRST. EVER. VLOG!
YOUR TURN! (If you’d like to participate, but don’t have a blog or don’t want to post on your blog, feel free to submit videos on YouTube or directly to me at: JKSchnedeker@yahoo.com.)
DEADLINE: Pumpkin Season (a.k.a. October 22, 2011). …The contest might be over, but you can check out the winner and the AWESOME prize here!
Go Jules Go 